


Nothing Gold Can Stay

by Anonymous_Ostrich



Category: Ni no Kuni, Ni no Kuni II: Revenant Kingdom
Genre: Cuddling & Snuggling, First Kiss, First Time, First Time Blow Jobs, Fluff, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pheromones, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-01
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-04-16 15:11:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Underage
Chapters: 11
Words: 26,551
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14167626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anonymous_Ostrich/pseuds/Anonymous_Ostrich
Summary: Roland did not often feel overwhelmed with information, but just now, he felt significantly over his capacity. He glanced down at Evan’s heaving form, a stiff rock forming in his throat, cutting off his air. So this was…? Evan was…?“Are you telling me that Evan is experiencing a… aheat?” Roland asked softly, unbelieving. “He’s in heat?”“Youer a sharp one, in’it?” Lofty groaned, rolling his eyes impatiently.





	1. In which secrets are poorly kept and Evermore's chief consul has too keen an eye

Nothing escaped Roland's meticulous eye.

He was critical in every way that mattered, and even in some that didn't. In politics, observation was paramount, but sometimes Roland suspected his observational skills were better suited for international espionage than the oval office. Regardless, it was nigh impossible to throw the wool over his eyes to say the least, and young King Evan Pettiwhisker was spectacularly bad at keeping secrets from  _anyone,_ let alone Roland. Evan's sweet, pure heart and gentle demeanor meant that anything in the way of deception was completely out of his range. This is what made it even more obvious when he started to behave out of the ordinary, and as usual, Roland was the first to pick up on it.

"Evan, are you feeling well?" Roland asked him as they strolled past the barracks, the faint sounds of arrows hitting soft targets and wooden swords clanging together echoing just out of sight. They'd been discussing their upcoming voyage to Broadleaf when Evan had abruptly trailed off, his breathing becoming shallow, beads of sweat forming delicately over his brow. At Roland's question, Evan's shoulders jerked and he averted his gaze, one of his hands rising to clutch at his chest.  _So there_ is  _something wrong_. Roland thought, frowning down at the young King in concern. "Evan?"

"I'm fine! It's, ah, just a bit hot out here, isn't it?" Evan attempted to explain unconvincingly. Roland tilted his head to better see Evan's quickly reddening face, noting the change in his posture and the rapid fall of his chest as he tried to pull subtle breaths in through his slightly parted lips.

"We're in the shade," Roland pointed out, and Evan's face pulled into a grimace of disappointment. Roland reached out to brush some of Evan's long blonde bangs from his forehead; although his fingers barely grazed the boy's skin, he could feel a powerful warmth radiating from him as though he'd just come from a warm bath. Roland stopped walking, grabbing Evan's shoulder in alarm. "Evan, you're burning up!"

As soon as his hand fell over Evan's shoulder, everything seemed to amplify in the young king. The rate of his breath, the rosy blush on his face and neck, and now that they were looking each other in the eye Roland could see that the boy's pupils were sharply dilated.

Possibly more distressing than any other symptom was the stricken look in Evan's expression, as though he were that frightened, cowering boy Roland had met during the coup in Ding Dong Dell all those months ago.

As a reflex - and because Evan's expression genuinely alarmed him - Roland released him, worried that perhaps he'd hurt him somehow despite how gentle he'd been. Evan staggered backward by only a step or two, averting his eyes in what seemed like mortification. For reasons he couldn't discern, Roland felt sick with himself.

"Evan, I really think you may be ill," Roland said carefully. "We should get inside. I'll call for a doctor once we get you into bed."

Evan's eyes shot back to Roland, shaking his head adamantly, an unconvincing smile pulling up the corners of his mouth. "N-no, really, I'm fine! Thank you, but I just need to lay down for a while. There's no need to send for anyone, s-so…" The young king looked down and away, his hands trembling. He turned on his heel and dashed away. "I'll s-see you later, okay?" he called, vanishing around the corner and out of view.

Roland watched him go, mouth agape. In all his years, he'd never been more conflicted on how to proceed. In the end, he recalled the horror-stricken look he'd seen fleetingly on his young friend's face and decided to leave him be. He would check in on him later, if Evan would permit it.

.

.

.

Since the young king's unusual episode several weeks ago, no more was spoken between them on the subject. Thankfully, a discussion didn't appear to be warranted. It seemed that in just a few days, Evan's behavior returned to normal. Roland felt that perhaps he'd overreacted before, but since Evan didn't seem to bear any ill will toward him, it didn't seem necessary to bring it up.

Not three weeks later, however, Roland noticed another change. Most of the time, Evan was his usual smiling, determined self, but Roland would occasionally catch glimpses of the strange symptoms he'd witnessed that day on their stroll through the kingdom. As the symptoms worsened, Evan began to distance himself from his friends and citizens. Roland didn't ask about it. He  _couldn't_. After the last time, Roland was hesitant to even place a hand on Evan again without his expressed permission.

Roland worried that a rift had risen between them. He badly wanted to ask Evan if there was anything he could do to repair whatever had been broken, but he couldn't bring himself to do that, either. Instead, he poured himself into work, focusing simply on being the best Chief Consul he could be for Evan and for the Kingdom of Evermore. New businesses were opening and new houses for the increasing number of citizens were under construction, so fortunately there was much to busy himself with.

It was only when he'd seen no sign of Evan for the better part of three days that he felt he could no longer stand idly by.

He went to Evan's room to check on him, determined to get the truth even if Evan tried to turn him away. What he found was an irate pirate girl stationed outside Evan's door in front of two palace guards, impatiently tapping her foot against the polished floor, her arms crossed tightly over her chest.

"Come on, Lofty, this is ridiculous!" the girl yelled through the door. "You two can't just stay cooped up in there forever!"

"Youer not about to stop us! Mind youer own business, don't be snoopin' like!" Lofty called back. Tani groaned in exasperation. She looked at the guards for help, but they simply shook their heads in a resigned way.

"King Evan has requested to be left alone," one of the guards said. "Sorry. Try again later."

"But he hasn't been out of that room in two days!" Tani argued, tossing her arms in the air.

"It's more like three, actually," Roland offered, stepping beside Tani and glowering critically at the guards. One glance at their faces and Roland knew the guards didn't know anymore than he and Tani did.

"Roland!" Tani exclaimed, immediately pointing an accusing finger at the door. "Evan is locked away in there, and Lofty is refusing to tell me anything about it! What if Evan is sick? Has he even eaten anything, does he have enough water?"

"Who do you think I am, mun?" Lofty called crossly.

"Well, how are we supposed to know with all the secrecy going on?" Tani shot back, punching her fists down at her sides hotly.

"Lofty," Roland called gently through the door, "This is Roland. We just want to know if Evan is alright. We're all very worried about him."

There was a short silence. "Roland?" Lofty answered, more like he was considering something than confirming who was speaking. Roland thought he could hear Lofty sigh heavily. "Roland, eh. Might be alright if it's you. Youer allowed to come in, but  _only_ you, get it?"

Honestly, Roland hadn't been expecting that. Tani shot him an equally surprised look, and a moment later looked ready to yell something through the door; Roland diffused her by patting her shoulder comfortingly. "I'll make sure he's alright," he promised her, and she deflated, her expression melting into friendly concern. "Depending on what's going on, I'll tell you whatever I can later. For the moment, please keep this to yourself. I'm not sure what's happening, but if Lofty is being this protective, it might be something bigger than we think. We don't need to cause any unnecessary panic among Evan's subjects, not when the kingdom is still so new and fragile."

Tani listened raptly, face set in understanding. She nodded. "Yeah. You're right. Just… make sure he's really okay, will you?"

"Of course."

Tani nodded again, and with a small sigh she turned and walked away, throwing one more look over her shoulder as she went. Roland turned back to the guards, who moved aside for him, and the door clicked, no longer locked.

For a moment, Roland was hit by a wave of unease, a sort of sick anticipation. If he wasn't already terribly worried, he certainly was now. Something was very wrong, if Lofty was acting this way. Not to mention Evan… What would make him hide himself away like this? It had to be related to the strange symptoms Roland had been noticing, but if it was something like an illness, surely Lofty wouldn't assist Evan in hiding it from his friends and avoiding medical help.

Roland set aside his half-baked theories for the moment and pushed the door open, slipping quietly inside. The guards immediately shut the door behind him.

Roland meant to ask Lofty what was going on, but his eyes found Evan first. His heart flew into his throat at what he saw.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've fallen for these two and there's no coming back.
> 
> Sorry for the *slight* cliffhanger, but I've already got a few chapters written, so there won't be much waiting involved. I'm not sure how many chapters this will be, but there's a very good chance it will earn a mature rating later on, so be prepared!
> 
> I have NOT finished the game yet, I just started Chapter 8, so no spoilers please!!! But feel free to talk to me about the game as much as you like up until that point :3


	2. In which Roland learns more than he bargained for

Roland stood stock-still in the doorway, shocked beyond words upon seeing the condition of Evermore's king.

All of Evan's blankets and sheets had been cast off of the bed save for one royal purple silk sheet, which was the only thing covering the boy's unconscious body. The sheet and bedding were soaked through with sweat. Evan's chest rose and fell with deep, labored breaths that sounded rough in his tired throat. His brow was drawn tightly as though he were in pain, and in between his ragged pants, moans and tiny gasps of discomfort slipped out.

Without a thought Roland rushed to Evan's side, looking down at the boy with mounting terror. "Good  _lord_ , what's wrong with him?!" Roland demanded, his throat catching on a moment of unguarded emotion. He turned to issue Lofty a fierce glare. "How could you have been keeping this a secret? We have to call a doctor,  _immediately_!"

"He ain't  _dying_ , for fae's sake!" Lofty insisted, hopping up and down waving his little arms.

"What are you-  _Look_ at him!" Roland roared furiously. "I don't know how the faeries do things, but when mere mortals get like  _this_ , they're usually dying!"

Lofty groaned in frustration and launched himself up onto Evan's bed, standing next to the boy's leg. "If you'd proper  _listen_ , I could flippin' explain!" the kingmaker said, hands on his hips. "This ain't no sickness! Well, not the sort humans get, anyway. This is sensitive like! Evan didn't want anyone to know, but it's worse than he thought. Than  _I_ thought. It's flippin' unusual, this is."

"Then what is this?" Roland demanded, willing himself to calm down. "Stop babbling and just  _tell_ me."

Lofty looked suddenly troubled, rubbing his hands over his face in distress. "Urrggg, Evan's gonna be right furious with me! But it can't be helped." He sighed, and his arms dropped to his sides. "It's the Grimalkin part of him, in'it? You've been here long enough to figure the ins and outs of the animal folk, I bet. S'hitting him early, but this is it. Evan's ready to find a mate, and his body's goin' proper nutty. Nothing to do but wait it out. Or at least we thought, but it's gettin' more serious than I expected."

Roland did not often feel overwhelmed with information, but just now, he felt significantly over his capacity. He glanced down at Evan's heaving form, a stiff rock forming in his throat, cutting off his air. So this was…? Evan was…?

"Are you telling me that Evan is experiencing a… a heat?" Roland asked softly, unbelieving. "He's in heat?"

"Youer a sharp one, in'it?" Lofty groaned, rolling his eyes impatiently.

Roland covered his face with his hand. "That… Wow."

"See why good ol' Evan wanted this hush hush?"

"Y-yes, I suppose so." Roland cast another look at the poor boy who was suffering in a way he could never understand, his heart clenching tightly. He reached out to instinctively brush some damp hair away from Evan's face, pressing his palm gently against his forehead. Evan's expression changed from the brief contact, his lips parting to issue a soft moan, his eyes darting swiftly behind closed lids. Roland drew away immediately, hissing in pain. Evan was absolutely burning up.

"Heat can do…  _this_? Even though he's anatomically male?"

"What's male gotta do with anything?" Lofty asked quizzically. "Round here, all animal folk go into heat when they're proper ready to breed. Gender's got nothin' to do with it."

Roland frowned at Lofty, still feeling slightly cross with the creature for keeping this a secret, even if it was per Evan's request.

"And how were  _you_ helping him, exactly? Magic?"

Lofty nodded gravely. "Keepin' him asleep was the only way to keep the pain at bay. It was working for a while. But then- yeah, you get it. My magic ain't cut out for this. I can heal up anyone proper tidy, but you can't heal what's not sick, in'it? He needs proper medicine."

"There's medicine to help with these symptoms?" Roland asked, perhaps too eagerly. He'd been offered a single shred of hope that he could help Evan with this terrible situation, and he intended to take it no matter the cost. "Where can we find some? We need to get him some medicine immediately!"

"Doncha think I would've gotten some already, if it were that flippin' easy?!" Lofty demanded crossly. "Even if I  _could_ snag a dose for the lad, it ain't no cure. There's no proper cure for what ails our little king. You even interested in why I let you in here to see him like this, and no one else? There's a problem, see."

"Tell me." Roland said unfalteringly.

Lofty sighed again. "When it hits a Grimalkin like this, means they're ready to mate. Normally they sort this all out tidy, arranged marriages or seeking out partners when the first waves start hittin' em. There's all organized. If Evan's parents were still around and the coup hadn't happened, they'd be takin' care of everything no problem. But Evan doesn't have anyone, and since he's sorta runnin' a kingdom, he's had no time to think about it. He didn't even know it was gonna happen! Coulda just inherited the human bits, no heats his whole life. What's even worse, it's hittin' him early. About three years too early."

"So what does this mean?" Roland asked impatiently. "What can I do for him?"

Lofty crossed his arms and said nothing. Roland watched him, waiting, until the realization hit him like a brick to the face. He staggered back a step, looking at Evan in horror before turning his ashen face back to the kingmaker. "No."

"I didn't say nothin'!"

"You don't have to. You want me to…" Roland shook his head, almost at a loss for words. Almost. "I could never. Evan… I care about Evan, I could never betray his trust like that! He would never forgive me, and I could never forgive myself. I will not simply  _violate_ him while he's in an altered state of mind-"

"Hang on there mun!" Lofty cut in, offended, "You think I would let anything bad ever happen to  _my_ Evan,  _my_ king? Youer mad!"

"You're saying he needs to  _mate_ with someone, and you've decided to tell me - exclusively me - all of the intimate details. What else am I supposed to deduce?"

"I know what I said!" Lofty said hotly. "I didn't say nothin' about violating anyone!" He shook his head. "Blimey, you still haven't figured it out? Maybe youer not as sharp as I gave you credit." At Roland's continued bewildered silence, Lofty let out one last mountainous sigh. "He  _loves_ you, you great idjit! His heat's so bad because he's as lovesick as a sailor for the sea. But he could never say it, so he's sufferin' like this instead."

A second brick hit Roland squarely in the face and he was stunned into silence. Evan was  _in love_  with him? Surely that couldn't be true. He knew they cared very much for each other, and they enjoyed spending time in each other's company, but surely Evan didn't love him in a romantic sense? There was the age difference for one - one that felt significantly longer in Roland's mind than in his body - and… Well, Evan was a king! In this world, Roland was no one. He was just a strange man from another world who appeared out of thin air one day and happened to be somewhat helpful during a turbulent time in the young king's life.

"It can't be," was all Roland managed to get out.

Beside him, Evan squirmed under the damp sheet, making a noise that was somewhere between pain and pleasure. He reached out, his fingers finding the hem of Roland's uniform and clutching it so tightly his knuckles bleached white. Roland watched the boy, mesmerized, and as if on cue, the unconscious boy's mouth formed a soft word.

" _R-roland_ …!"

Roland's chest seized with an odd sensation. Hearing his name spoken like that from those soft, rosy lips delighted him in ways he couldn't explain, and in the same breath it terrified him to his core. It was as though Evan was…  _asking_ for him. Pleading. Something stirred in Roland's loins, but he firmly stomped on the impulse, reigning in every shred of self control he possessed, disgusted with himself for how quickly his body could react to such a disturbing prospect.

"Eh? What'd I say, mun?" Lofty walked up the length of Evan's bed and snagged a folded cloth from the bedside table, dunking it in the basin of cool water there. He wrung it out in his small hands and then moved to Evan's side, placing the cloth on the boy's head. "I'm not sayin' you have to do anything. I'm only sayin' the lad won't want anyone else, and it's gotta be right soon."

Roland couldn't find words. His head swimming, no longer convinced he could remain standing upright, he sat on the edge of Evan's bed, gently pulling the boy's hand from his uniform and holding it between his own. He watched the uneven rise and fall of Evan's frail chest, his eyes tracing the soft angles of Evan's face, catching the droplets of perspiration on the tips of his long eyelashes.

He remained silent for a good long moment, considering all the elements as best he could with a fuzzy mind. He realized now that the sweet, subtle scent he'd been vaguely aware of since entering the room was emanating from Evan - some sort of hormone or pheromone, perhaps - and it was undoubtedly responsible for plunging Roland's usually sharp mind into a jumble of hazy nonsense.

Finally, he spoke. "What will happen to him if he doesn't mate?" he asked flatly.

Lofty had been so absorbed in seeing to Evan he visibly started when Roland spoke up. "Eh, not sure. He's half human, so maybe it'll be easier on 'im. But usually, it's lotsa pain. Only alleviated by mating, ya see. Since he fancies you, he ain't gonna look for anyone else. I know him well enough to know that."

"This is his second heat, yes? It's monthly, then?"

"Proper right."

"And the medicine you mentioned. What will it do for him? It can't stop his heat, but can it at least take the edge off? Couldn't he take the medicine during each heat, so that it isn't so… so painful?"

"The medicine ain't cheap, mun, and its flippin' hard to find right at the moment, in'it? It used to be produced in Ding Dong Dell, so you can imagine it's impossible to track down what with the way things are over there, no one comin' or goin'. Poor Grimalkin are probably havin' a proper hard time without it."

Roland groaned, rubbing his forehead. "Of course, I should have realized." He held his chin in his hand, considering his options for a moment before glancing back up at Lofty. "How much longer does he have to go through this? A few days? A week?"

"Hard to say, but it's been two days so far, so… Maybe five more? Gets worse toward the end, it does."

"Alright." Roland gave Evan's hand a reassuring squeeze and stood up, straightening his uniform with a sharp tug. "I'm going to go fetch him that medicine."

"What're you on about?" Lofty exclaimed. "I just said it's flippin' hard to come by!"

"We have plenty of connections and resources by now, I'm positive I can scare up at least one dose. I swear I'll have it for him in less than two days."

"And then what?" Lofty demanded, as Roland made to leave the room. "You countin' on lady luck to get Evan a new dose every month? I'd be flippin' shocked if you could get youer hands on even  _one_ dose, let alone two or three!"

Roland stopped with his hand on the doorknob, glancing back at the faerie at Evan's side. "I want to give Evan a chance to tell me how he feels. I decided a long time ago that I would stay by his side no matter what. If he wants me, truly wants me, then I won't hesitate." His eyes slid to Evan, his heart panging painfully once again at the sight of his unconcious king. "But I need to hear it from his own mouth. Even if he does have feelings for me, I would still be taking advantage of him if he can't even consent to what's happening."

Lofty whistled, eyes wide. He looked impressed. "There's proper honorable, that is," he said wondrously.

"I hardly agree," Roland answered with a half-hearted grin, "but I'm doing my best."

Casting one last look at Evan's pained form, Roland pulled the door open and left in a determined hurry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Half of writing this thing has been learning to write over-the-top Welsh accents, I swear. It's been an experience. 
> 
> Roland is off to save the day! Kind of? He's off to postpone the day, at least.


	3. In which matters of the heart are discussed gently and with care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roland and Evan discuss some things over tea. Neither of them drink their tea.

In just under 40 sleepless hours, Roland had secured the medicine, just as he'd promised. The list of people he'd spoken to, bartered with, run dangerous errands for and now owed debts to was as long as his arm but he'd done it, and he personally handed the small vial of pale lavender liquid to Lofty just before sitting down in the nearest armchair for the first time since leaving Evan's bedroom almost two days prior and promptly passed out.

Hours later, Roland awoke in his own room, still in his clothes but tucked underneath the blankets of his bed. Roland sat up, his mind still hazy and his body still exhausted. He tossed the blankets off his sore body and trudged to the washroom to clean up before going to check on Evan. He hadn't meant to fall asleep like that. He'd wanted to make sure the medicine worked, but surely Lofty would have woken him if something had gone wrong.

Roland paused in front of Evan's door, his hand freezing just before his knuckles rapped against the wood. Assuming Evan was feeling better, did he even  _want_ to see Roland? If Lofty had mentioned that he'd allowed Roland to see him at his most vulnerable - or worse, if Lofty admitted he'd told Roland how Evan felt about him - it was entirely possible that Roland was the very last person Evan wanted to see. For a moment Roland almost let that possibility deter him, but ultimately he knew he couldn't rest until he was certain Evan was safe and well. If Evan no longer wanted his company, he would give him the opportunity to tell him that himself.

Just when he'd gathered the fortitude to finally knock, the door swung open and a blonde, blue-eyed King was staring up at him, his pale face flushed a gentle rose, his lips parted in surprise. He was lightly dressed in a pale egg-blue dress shirt and beige trousers, a sheet tightly clutched in his hands and wrapped around his shoulders and arms like a makeshift cloak. Roland's heart swelled with relief in seeing Evan up and around, even if he still looked slightly fragile.

"Roland…!"

"Evan, thank  _goodness_ , you're- Ah, you're looking well," he gently corrected upon noticing the faint blush that added a dash more pink to the king's face. "I just wanted to make sure you were alright. If you'd rather be alone, I can-"

Evan's hand shot out from under his sheet and grabbed Roland's sleeve, his lips pressing together into a thin line. "N-no! I wanted to see you, I…" Evan cleared his throat, slowly uncurling his fingers from Roland's sleeve. "I was actually going to see if  _you_ were alright. I heard what you did, and…" He trailed off, looking down at the floor.

Roland smiled softly. "After everything, you were worried about  _me_?"

"Well, you know…"

A small red creature peeked out from behind Evan's legs before making for the door, passing Roland on his way out. "Eh, I'll leave you two alone to chat. Need some fresh air after bein' cooped up in this room for so long, in'it?"

"Ah," Evan watched Lofty trot out of the room, clutching his sheet around his shoulders more tightly. "T-thanks Lofty!"

Lofty waved without looking back, disappearing around the corner of the hall. Roland smiled, turning back to Evan. "May I come in?" he asked the young king. Evan nodded, stepping back to allow Roland entry.

Evan closed the door behind them and trotted over to the small round table in the sitting area, picking up a teapot of steaming tea and pouring a cup. Roland noted the way the boy's hands were still trembling. "Tea, Roland?"

"That would be fine, thank you, but I can take care of that, Evan." Roland leaned over the table and gently touched Evan's shaking hand, prompting him to lower the pot and release it. "Please, have a seat and relax. You haven't been well, after all."

Evan smiled softly and did as Roland requested, sitting down in the armchair by the table. Roland finished pouring the tea and handed the first cup to Evan, who held the steaming cup between his hands as though he were absorbing the warmth from the ceramic. "I'm sure I could have managed it," Evan said with an awkward chuckle.

"I'm sure you could," Roland returned with a smile, pouring his own cup and then wordlessly offering the bowl of sugar to the boy, scooping a spoonful into Evan's cup when the boy nodded an affirmative. "But there's no harm in taking it easy, either."

"What about you?" Evan asked, concerned. "Lofty told me you haven't slept in two days! He said that you worked so very hard to find me that tonic, and once you'd brought it to the castle you fainted from exhaustion! Lofty had to call Batu to carry you to bed."

Roland winced at the unflattering phrasing, though at least he'd learned how he ended up in his own room. "That's quite the exaggeration," he chuckled, settling in the armchair opposite Evan with his own tea in hand, "I've pulled plenty of all-nighters in my time, for much less compelling or urgent reasons. Besides, I got a good few hours of sleep, and I feel just fine."

Evan's gaze lowered to his teacup. "Still… Thank you for everything you did, Roland. I very much appreciate it."

"Of course. I'm just relieved you're feeling better." Roland crossed a leg over his knee, watching Evan curiously from across the table. "Evan… You should know, if you don't already, that Lofty told me everything."

Evan's eyes were boring holes into his tea, staring into the steaming amber liquid as though he were trying to cool it with his mind. After a moment, he nodded.

"Lofty told me."

"He didn't know what else to do, Evan. He was frightened for your safety."

"I know. I'm not mad at him. Or… at you, or anyone else for that matter."

Roland let out a small sigh of relief. "I'm glad."

Evan's face was growing pinker by the second. He still couldn't meet Roland's eyes. "I must apologize on Lofty's behalf. I know that he was concerned about me, but he put you in such an  _ugly_ position. You must have been so repulsed… And then putting so much strain on yourself, just to acquire that medicine for me even though you didn't have to." He shook his head, clutching his cup tightly in his hands. "Regardless of the severity of the situation, that wasn't very fair of Lofty, guilting you like that."

"Guilting?" Roland repeated, frowning. "Surely you don't think I did all that because Lofty hoodwinked me into it?"

Evan looked up, his lovely blue eyes round in surprise. "I… I didn't mean-"

"Evan," Roland cut him off sternly, "I was worried about you. We  _all_ were. I wasn't repulsed by the situation, I simply didn't want to do anything without talking to you first. I want to help you with what you're going through, but I couldn't fathom doing anything without your consent."

A thick silence fell over the room. Evan stared at Roland, eyes still round and vaguely puzzled, his lips kissed together in a firm line. As the seconds ticked on, Roland slowly realized that perhaps he should have been more specific about what 'everything' entailed when it came to what Lofty had boldly divulged two days ago.

"Ah… that is…" Roland cleared his throat awkwardly. "What exactly did Lofty tell you he said…?"

Evan's lips parted in sudden realization, his face flushing deep pink in mortification. His teacup almost dropped from his hands before he found the good sense to place it away from him on the table. "He told me that he confided in you about my… my condition. And that you went off to fetch me some medicine, at great cost to your own wellbeing. Nothing more."

Roland internally cursed himself. He would be having a talk with Lofty later. "I see." he answered stiffly.

"W-what else did he tell you?" Evan asked feebly. Roland's stomach churned with guilt. The thought struck him to simply deny that he knew anything more, but Roland detested lying in all forms unless it was positively necessary. There was also the matter of Evan's future heats to consider. This was something they needed to talk about.

"He…" Roland sighed heavily. "He told me that your heat hit you especially hard because you may have certain… affections for me. He implied that I could help relieve your discomfort, and that you might not find that arrangement disagreeable."

The look on Evan's face might have been heartbreaking if it hadn't been so adorable. The boy's face quickly flushed entirely crimson, his mouth open in the beginnings of a fumbled retort that never quite made it out. He hid his face in his hands, his ears laying flat against his head.

"He told you  _that_?" Evan groaned into his hands, barely recognizable as words.

"I'm afraid so," Roland answered. "Was he mistaken?"

Evan's shoulders went tense, but a moment later he shook his head, golden hair swaying, his face still encased firmly in his palms. "N-no."

Roland couldn't help but smile, watching the mortified young king hide bashfully in his own hands. He'd never seen Evan exactly like this, acting like a proper pre-teen with a crush. Roland barely remembered what it felt like; that nervous explosion of fear and exhilaration bubbling in one's stomach, a sickly reminder of how much older than Evan he truly was even if the years didn't show on his face.

"Evan, it's alright. You don't have to be embarrassed with me. I don't think any less of you. I'm flattered, if anything."  _Good grief_ , Roland thought to himself,  _even now, I can't help but give him fatherly encouragement._

Evan peeked out between his fingers, his eyes glossy with the threat of tears. "You're not… offended? Or disgusted?"

"Why would I be?" Roland chuckled. "Why would anyone be offended to learn that King Evan Pettiwhisker of Evermore held certain affections for them? Actually, I'm quite sure I would be the envy of the nation were anyone to find out."

Evan slowly lowered his hands, his head slightly lowered, eyes upturned to regard Roland in apprehension. "So… You're not cross with me, then?"

"Of course not." Roland answered seriously.

The young king averted his eyes again. "But… You don't feel the same way for me as I do for you, correct?" Evan's voice was small and terrified, as though he were awaiting judgment.

Roland considered Evan's inquiry for a moment, laying morality aside in favor of truth, and then extended a hand, gesturing for the boy to come closer. At Evan's confused silence, Roland smiled reassuringly. "I would like you to come over here, if you wouldn't mind. Are you feeling well enough to stand?"

Evan nodded vaguely and stood from his chair, albeit a tad shakily, and stepped around the table to take Roland's outstretched hand. Roland set his untouched tea aside and gently pulled the boy closer, urging him onto his lap, resting his hands supportively on the low of the young king's back when Evan obediently turned to sit on Roland's legs.

"I care about you very much, Evan," Roland told the boy softly. "I admit, until all of this happened, I never considered exploring my feelings for you beyond friendship. As soon as I learned what was happening to you, I realized that I want to be whatever you need me to be. I'm not certain I can say I feel the same way for you as you do for me, but I know I would be happy to stay by your side, if you'll have me. Whether you wish for me to mate with you or simply continue being your Chief Consul, I want to support you in any way I can."

Evan's hands slid over Roland's shoulders and he stared at him in vague shock, searching his eyes disbelievingly. "Roland, you can't be serious! Do you even know what it means to m-mate with a Grimalkin who is in heat?"

Roland smiled. "I can't say I do, but I imagine it's something like the kingsbond between a ruler and his or her kingmaker, is that accurate?"

"Well, yes, but much less… intense."

"Meaning, if the bond is broken, neither one of us will go on a destructive rampage that could level a nation? How disappointing."

Despite his earlier embarrassment, Evan couldn't prevent a soft giggle of amusement. "Nothing quite so dramatic. It simply means that our…  _biology_ will become highly compatible. When I go into, uhm, h-heat, you'll be able to feel it."

"Feel it?" Roland repeated, bothered by his own tendency to fully map out any scenario described to him in vivid detail. He realized that perhaps inviting Evan to sit on his lap with the intention of discussing  _heat sex_  was not the best idea. "How do you mean?"

"It's hard to explain," Evan admitted sheepishly. "My mother told me it felt a lot like being possessed. A-ah, I mean, that sounds really bad when I put it that way! She told me that whenever it was my father's, ah, time, she could sense when he needed her. Grimalkin release a sort of pheromone to attract their mate, and their chosen mate can get sort of, uhm,  _dependant_  on it. It can have all sorts of strange side-effects!"

"Will something like that affect me, seeing as how I'm human?" Roland asked curiously.

"My mother was human, so I would suspect so."

Roland hummed, his brow furrowing in its usual thoughtful way. "I see. So long as it doesn't interfere with my ability to help you run this kingdom, something like that shouldn't be a problem."

Evan's face grew very pink again, and he hurriedly buried his face into his palms. "Roland, how can you say things like that so casually…!?" he groaned in mortification. Roland snapped out of his odd rumination, chuckling at Evan's reaction.

"I'm only trying to figure out all the variables," he said fondly. "Sorry, I guess it's not very romantic, declaring those sorts of things so plainly."

Evan slumped forward, burying his face in Roland's collar. "I still can't believe you… You really…" Evan shook his head in disbelief, golden hair brushing Roland's chin. "Are you sure you're really okay with all of this? I know you're not from this world, and I know you must have a very different sort of life in that other place, right? Are you certain b-being with me is something you want? Am I really worth all this trouble...?"

The question took Roland off-guard, so much so that he almost wasn't sure how to reply right away. He'd never pegged his young friend to have a poor self-regard in any respect. Evan was sometimes unsure of himself, certainly, but he was always determined to do his best. He possessed an unshakable will that would impress even the most ruthless sovereign. Even those who might consider Evan's ideals to be on the naive side, his steadfast dedication to his cause was enough to convince anyone that he knew exactly what he was doing. This fear of inadequacy didn't suit him.

For an answer, Roland wrapped Evan's body in his arms, embracing him tightly, burying his nose in Evan's golden hair. Evan let out a surprised squeak.

"R-roland…?"

"Evan, listen to me. Even if this situation  _were_ a bother, you would certainly be worth it. There's nothing troublesome about the prospect of being your mate. I'm already quite protective of you, so I doubt much will change in that regard. And as for the life I left behind… Well, I don't have any current plans to go back there. This is my home now. I just want to make sure you're comfortable with the idea of being with me in that way. I know this was all very unexpected for you." Roland squeezed the boy a little tighter, feeling the soft but rapid thump of Evan's heartbeat against his own. "All I wish for is your happiness."

Slowly, timidly, Evan's arms wound around Roland's neck, hugging Roland back just as tightly. "If you want me, I'm happy," he said, voice muffled and vaguely tearful. "You're right, this was unexpected. I didn't think I would need to worry about finding a mate for a few more years at least, and this isn't the way I would have planned confessing my f-feelings for you, but…" He sniffed, pressing his face harder into the bend of Roland's neck. "I'm happy. I'm really happy."

"Then it's decided," Roland murmured into Evan's hair. "I'm your mate, for as long as you'll have me."

Evan giggled softly, his small shoulders shaking from either the laughter or tears, it was impossible to tell. A deep, soft purr sounded from somewhere in the boy's chest, sending pleasant vibrations against Roland's tired body. It might have surprised him if he hadn't been so suddenly exhausted, but instead he merely rose a hand to gently stroke Evan between his ears and down the back of his head. The purr grew louder and more steady, Evan nuzzling his face more firmly into Roland's neck. In moments, the boy was fast asleep, his arms loosening their hold around Roland's neck.

Roland carefully regarded the young king in his lap, watching him sleep, his face the very picture of contentment. He pressed a kiss to the boy's forehead as a stray thread of worry came unwound in his mind, the fear that the proposed bond they were to share might not last as long as he or Evan hoped.

If Roland had learned anything worthwhile in the life he'd left behind, it was that nothing lasts forever.

For now, however, Roland tried not to dwell on what might be. Just at the moment there was an exhausted young king in his lap, and Roland knew the boy needed proper sleep far more than he did. Careful not to wake him or jostle him too much, Roland pulled the boy up into his arms and walked to the bed, strategically moving the newly washed blankets aside while simultaneously - and carefully - lowering Evan down on the plush bedding, pulling the blankets over the boy's serene form.

As soon as he'd ensured Evan was comfortable, Roland felt his body sway on the spot, suddenly drained of all his energy. He caught himself, surprised at how quickly he could succumb to the exhaustion that was still lingering after his almost 40-hour quest. He thought to simply fall into bed beside Evan, the alluring comfort of the four-poster shamelessly calling his name. He was momentarily uncertain if something like that would be appropriate until he realized that just moments ago, he had agreed to become Evan's  _mate_ , and then immediately felt rather foolish. Still, it was strange to consider getting into someone else's bed without their permission-

As if on cue, the sleeping king reached out and grabbed a hold of Roland's jacket, holding it tightly in his fist once again. Roland watched in mild surprise, a small smile pulling at his lips. It was the same as the other day but so very different. It was as if Evan was wordlessly asking for Roland to stay. That was all the convincing he needed.

Pulling off his boots and jacket, Roland slipped into bed beside Evan. Just as soon as his weight dipped the mattress Evan automatically turned to face him and wormed in close, nuzzling his head against Roland's chest and clutching at his shirt, his breathing deep and even with sleep. He was still purring up a storm. Roland smiled and wrapped the boy up in his arms - his  _mate_ , he realized again with an uneasy frisson of excitement - finding a comfortable position for his arms before closing his eyes and letting sleep take him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I like how each of these chapters is just getting progressively longer
> 
> Sorry they haven't gotten frisky yet, I tagged it as slow burn for a reason!! I promise it's on the way, but before then, there will be fluff galore so get ready
> 
> Where are you all at, game wise? I just finished up the Dreamer's Doors, which was my very last side-quest before going into the final boss, (I think, anyway) so in other words I'm super close to beating it. PLEASE STAY, ROLAND! I REALLY JUST DON'T WANT ROLAND TO LEAVEEE


	4. In which Roland and Evan take a moment to breathe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roland and Evan get a chance to relax. Evan tells Roland a secret.

The next few weeks rolled by in a blink. There was much to attend to in Evermore while the improvements were made to their ship in preparation for the journey to Broadleaf, so both Roland and Evan were kept quite busy. Although it was nice to be able to accomplish so many tasks, it didn't leave much time for fraternizing beyond seeing each other for breakfast or the occasional late-night chat that always started too late and ended too soon. Roland had agreed to essentially become Evan's  _lover -_ the mate of a young King - without fully mapping out how the upcoming months were going to work between them.

This wasn't typically how relationships functioned, Roland knew that. One didn't typically launch directly into planning sexual encounters only moments after admitting feelings for the other. He had to admit in hindsight that he didn't feel completely comfortable with the idea of possibly having sex with someone before even getting the chance to enjoy more couple-like activities with them, especially one so young and inexperienced. The matter of their age difference was troubling, to say the least. Evan was roughly his son's age - a disturbing prospect on its own. In body, Roland suspected he was only six or seven years older than Evan, but in his mind the gap between them spanned longer than three decades. He knew that circumstance played a part in the rather odd way they'd come together, but circumstance alone didn't make it okay.

What would his own country, his own  _world_ think of such an outlandish union? The thought disagreed with him, making his stomach swim with momentary guilt. He'd once had a family in that world. A wife, a son, a life full of both joy and misery in equal measure before he'd found himself here in this world of magic and kings and earnest, sweet young men with cat ears.

Regardless of his doubts, every time Roland considered the prospect of Evan turning elsewhere for relief from his heats, something inside of him surged and churned with fierce protectiveness.

Their first true moment of solace came to them shortly after they disembarked for Broadleaf. There weren't many duties a Chief Consul could attend to out on the open ocean, even less so for a King, and so as soon as Roland had done a sweep of the ship and ensured everything was ship-shape, pun not intended, he thought to seek Evan out.

He found Evan standing alone and looking vaguely lost on the quarterdeck, gazing out at the sparkling water, his hands anchored on the railing. Roland approached, careful not to startle him.

"Is everything alright?" Roland asked, stepping up beside Evan as the boy glanced up at him, his eyes seeming to refocus.

"Ah, Roland," Evan shook his head gently with a smile, golden hair blowing gently in the breeze. "I'm just feeling a bit aimless, honestly. We've been so busy lately, it's strange to have nothing to do."

"I feel the same," Roland admitted with a grin. He leaned his arms on the railing, looking out at the sea, the crisp breeze chilling his skin. "When you have so many important duties that take up so much of your time, being idle is unsettling. But you need to remember to take time for yourself as well, or you'll burn yourself out."

Evan let out a small sigh. "You're right." He flashed Roland a sweet smile. "I promise I feel fine, though. So don't worry too much."

"I'm your Chief Consul," Roland pointed out playfully, "it's pretty much my job to worry."

Despite his attempt at being lighthearted, Evan's face fell just enough to catch Roland's attention, and his eyes slid back to the expanse of ocean beyond the railing. Roland watched Evan curiously, noting the soft pout on his mouth and the way his brow pinched in thought.

"Evan? Is something wrong?"

The young king's face flushed pink. He nibbled on his bottom lip. "Ah, well, I was just thinking… You're the very best Chief Consul I could ever ask for, Roland. I don't know what I or the kingdom would do without you. But…" He drew in a slow, tight breath. "We haven't had much time to… talk about everything that happened weeks ago. What, uhm, do people call each other when they've decided to be…  _more_ than just friends and colleagues?"

For a moment, Roland found himself at a loss for words. Evan quickly shot him an embarrassed look, his face positively crimson. "N-not that I don't understand how these things work! I k-know what happens when two people- I mean, I'm not  _that_ naive- it's just, this is an unusual situation and I worry that perhaps I may have pushed you into something that you're not comfortable with, so, that is, ahh-" Evan pushed his lips together, flustered. "Gosh, I'm terribly sorry, I'm making a big mess of thi-"

"A couple." Roland cut him off gently, scooping up one of Evan's mildly trembling hands and holding it tight in his own. "We're a couple, Evan. For as long as you'd like us to be."

The king glanced up at Roland with round eyes and parted lips, his mouth slowly forming a relieved smile. He let out a calming breath, squeezing Roland's hand. "A couple." he repeated softly, contentedly. "My, I like the sound of that."

"I'm sorry there hasn't been much time to, well, take you to do the sorts of things couples typically do. I should have tried to schedule more free time, or…"

"There's no need to apologize, Roland," Evan reassured with a sweet laugh. "Neither one of us has had any time to spare. We're building a kingdom, after all."

Roland smiled, gently rubbing the top of Evan's hand with his thumb in slow circles. "I know. Still, I'd like to spend time with you that doesn't involve fighting monsters or discussing kingdom affairs. I may have agreed to help you with your, ah, rather sensitive problem, but I want you to know that I'm not just going along with all of this just to do you a favor. I care about you."

"Roland…" Evan's eyes sparkled with emotion. He offered Roland a rosy smile, stepping closer, holding Roland's hand tight in his own. "I want to spend more time with you, too."

"Well then, when we return from Broadleaf, I'll make sure we set some time aside."

"Yes!"

For a time, they stood in comfortable silence, Evan's head resting against Roland's arm. The gentle sounds of the ocean sloshing against the sides of the boat paired with the mild breeze made for a calming atmosphere, a refreshing reprieve from the hustle and bustle of Evan's growing country. For weeks now, Roland had been almost constantly surrounded by the sounds of nails being driven into wood, stone being hauled and worked, and people coming and going as citizens of Evermore set up shops, improved their homes and worked hard at their respective jobs. Roland couldn't claim that he disliked the sounds of progress - quite the opposite, in fact - but suddenly being surrounded by miles of water in every direction was a welcome change.

"Roland?" Evan's voice piped up after several minutes of quiet, curious, "What do couples usually talk about?"

Roland hummed thoughtfully. "Anything. Nothing. Things that make you happy, things that make you sad, and everything in between."

Evan made a soft noise of wonder. "That's quite a lot," he pointed out.

"Of course," Roland chuckled. "When you've found someone you truly care about and can place your trust, you can tell that person anything."

"I've never had anyone I could tell  _anything_ to," Evan admitted. "Well… Maybe Nella, but…" Roland gave Evan's hand a soft squeeze. Evan smiled awkwardly. "I'm sorry. Did I, uhm, ruin the moment?"

"Not at all," Roland assured. "This is what I meant. We can talk about anything you like. Would you like to talk about Aranella? It's healthy to talk about that stuff, you know." Saying something like that nearly made Roland laugh out loud at his own hypocrisy. He was spectacularly bad at taking his own advice, sometimes.

Evan watched the ocean in consideration. After a moment, he shook his head decisively. "N-no. Not right now, anyway." He flashed Roland a bright smile. "But I do want to tell you all about her, sometime. I want you to really know what a kind, strong and wonderful person she was."

"I look forward to it."

Evan turned and faced Roland though his eyes were downcast, their hands still entwined. He finally glanced up, his face tinted pink, a timid smile shaping his lips. "Since I can tell you anything, Roland, may I tell you a secret?"

Without full realizing he was doing it, Roland leaned down to better hear the young king. The promise of a secret always quietly urged one to disregard personal space. "Of course. What is-"

Before he could finish his inquiry, Evan's face filled Roland's field of vision and something soft covered his mouth. When Roland's brain caught up with the sequence of events he realized Evan was kissing him, the boy's lips pursed sweetly but slightly rigid and unsure, his free hand clutching the lapel of Roland's jacket tightly to hold him close.

Kissing Evan felt overwhelmingly natural. Immediately Roland's instincts kicked in, a hand raising to cup Evan's face, his mouth moving gently and cautiously against the young king's, lips parting only enough to remind the boy to breathe. He smoothed his thumb encouragingly over Evan's cheek, drawing a soft purr from deep in the boy's throat. Evan's lips finally relaxed, following Roland's soft, guiding motions.

Another moment more, and they slowly pulled apart. Roland's eyes traced the boy's dazed expression, noting the way his lips remained gently parted as if silently asking for another kiss, his eyes clouded over and faraway. Evan appeared to pull himself together, his lips pressing together for a moment as though savoring the taste of Roland's lips. Roland watched him, mesmerized, and Evan offered him a playful, coy smile.

"I've never kissed anyone," Evan giggled, pressing a finger to his own mouth. "That was my secret. But I suppose that's not true anymore."

For a wondrous and vaguely terrifying moment, Roland realized that perhaps Evan had a larger capacity for deception than he'd previously assumed. Not to imply that was a bad thing, of course. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: I really want to write some Roland/Evan smut >:333  
> Me to me: Write 4+ chapters of build-up with absolutely no smut whatsoever
> 
> Oh real quick, my headcanon for Roland’s wife is that she died when his son was still very young. I might make mention of that later, but I just wanted to clarify that Roland is not, in fact, knowingly and willingly cheating on his wife with Evan lol
> 
> Spoilers for Chapter 6 of the game in the next chapter!


	5. In which some concerns are noted and other are put to rest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Batu has a word with Roland. Evan disappears.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **Spoilers for Chapter Six of the game ahead!**

The hotel in Broadleaf was efficiently laid out, but comfort-wise, it left much to be desired. Or perhaps Roland had gotten too used to huge, plush beds and comfy armchairs over the years.

The moment they'd stepped foot into Broadleaf, it had been an almost constant whirlwind of stress and turmoil. Despite the odds being significantly against them, they still managed to defeat the raging kingmaker Bastion, while also returning president Zip Vector to normal. In the end, not only did they catch their first glimpse of Lofty's true kingmaker form, but Evan had successfully formed a union with Broadleaf, a powerful ally. They'd also managed to snag yet another tag-along in Bracken, who seemed eager to take a peek at the current state of Evermore's engineering department.

Before the sun had even begun to set, Bracken led the utterly exhausted and battle-beaten entourage to the local hotel for a well-deserved rest. The rooms - if they could even be called that - were more like glorified drawers, just a small crawl-space sized door that opened to a bed, an overhead shelf for belongings, and a vent to keep the air circulated and clean. "Pod rooms", they called them. Evan stayed behind to speak with Zip for a while longer, and so Roland made his way to the hotel with Lofty in tow.

"I can't believe how big n' long I was, mun! There's majestic! You saw it, right? You saw me up there, all huge and mighty like?"

"How could I miss it?" Roland chuckled, glancing down at Lofty with an amused smile. "Not to mention… You haven't been able to stop talking about it since it happened."

"The cheek! Are you sayin' you wouldn't be right feverish, were you in my boots?" Lofty demanded seriously.

Roland frowned in thought. "Well… I suppose not."

"Youre flippin' right you wouldn't."

A deep, gruff voice spoke up suddenly, gaining their attention and halting their progress to the hotel. "Have a moment?"

Roland turned to find Batu standing off to the side, leaning against a pillar with his arms crossed, wearing a stormy expression. It seemed he'd been waiting for them to pass. His eyes seemed intensely focused on Roland, his jaw tight as though he were biting back words in Lofty's presence. Something was wrong. Roland immediately felt the tension in the air, taking note of Batu's intimidating posture and expression.

"Ye busy, lad?" Batu asked Roland, his voice almost a growl. "I'd like ta chat, if ye have the time."

Roland felt his shoulders stiffen, a reflex. "Of course. Lofty, you go, I'll be along."

Lofty looked between the men curiously before shrugging, offering them a dismissive wave as he waddled past, heading off to who knows where. "Flippin' heck mun, I know when to take a hint," the kingmaker murmured grumpily. "Don't take too long. Evan'll want all of us together when he gets back, I reckon."

"Sure." Roland answered, still watching Batu like a mouse might watch a hungry cat. Batu hadn't taken his eyes off of Roland for a single moment since he'd caught his attention, and Roland could  _feel_ the murderous intent radiating from the burly man like waves. Roland wasn't an idiot. He knew there was only one thing that could have happened to make Batu act like this. So he said nothing.

"Let's take a walk," Batu growled, turning and indicating for Roland to follow. Roland followed without question.

They walked in silence for several moments as Batu led them to a quiet, isolated area around the upper streets. Roland grew increasingly concerned the farther away they traveled from their companions; vivid images of Batu's giant mallet coming down over Roland's unsuspecting head flashed in his mind's eye.

Batu finally stopped on the topmost balcony overlooking the hotel. He turned to face Roland with daggers in his eyes. "So. I couldn't help but notice how chummy ye're gettin' with our little Evan. Saw ye on the ship, I did."

Roland's stomach sank. He was prepared for this much, of course, he only wished they could have gone a little longer without someone blowing the whistle on their relationship, for Evan's sake. Roland wasn't even certain Evan wanted their relationship to be public, and he wouldn't blame him if he preferred it remain a secret. Roland knew how politics worked. Evan was the king of a brand new kingdom; a scandal was the very last thing he needed.

"There's no sense in denying what you saw, I suppose," Roland admitted. "But it's really not what you th-"

"Ye admit it! Blazes, how could ye? The lad trusts ye, he do! Takin' advantage of 'im like that, doin' this and that with 'im-"

"Now just hold on," Roland raised a hand in a stern plea for silence, his temper rising at the implications, "no one is taking advantage of  _anyone_. You don't understand the situation-"

Batu took a sizable step toward him, his intimidating form blocking Roland's only means of escape. His voice was low and menacing. "I don't need ta understand, ye scurvy dog! The lad's me daughter's age, just a younin'. Ye should be ashamed. What's ta stop me from walloping ye, right here an' now?"

Despite Batu's threats, Roland refused to divulge Evan's personal medical situation. That was Evan's business and no one else's, but unfortunately, it seemed like the subject of Evan's heats was the only means of getting out of this situation alive. Thank goodness Roland was great at thinking on his feet.

"Tell me something," Roland replied, as calmly as he could manage, "does Evan seem unhappy?"

Batu's expression changed on a dime. He stepped off if only a little, considering, still shooting Roland a glare that could cut diamonds. "Well… That's…"

"Do you honestly think so little of me that you believe I would take advantage of Evan? Or, alternatively, that Evan would allow himself to be taken advantage of by me?"

"The boy's a gentle soul, ye know that as well as I do!"

"Kindness and naivety are not synonymous with each other. Evan may be striving for the impossible with his goal of world peace, but he's no fool. Everything that's happening, Evan is entirely consenting. And nothing  _has_ happened yet, if that helps comfort you in any way. Not that it's any of your concern in the first place."

Batu's earlier fury seemed to have waned, leaving only reluctant aggravation in its place. He huffed and crossed his arms, turning away slightly to glower down the stairs.

"Yer right, I reckon. I still can't say I approve."

Roland relaxed. "And I can't exactly blame you for being concerned. So let me tell you this: I would never, ever do anything to hurt Evan. As a matter of fact, I have only his best interests at heart. That's the truth."

Batu side-eyed him curiously. "Might this 'ave anything ta do with the secretive mischief ye got up to weeks ago? When I dragged ye back to yer room, the lad looked unwell. Hours later he was bright as a huebloom, and he was right worried about ye. Told me ye almost killed ye'reself to help 'im, but wouldn't say how."

It was difficult to tell, but Roland suspected there was appreciation buried somewhere in Batu's voice. He merely nodded, still refusing to divulge anything more than what was already known. "You would have done the same for him."

"Maybe." Batu said simply, suspiciously, and then fell quiet. After a time, he sighed, looking away. "If ye ever do anythin' to hurt the lad, ye better prepare for a world o' pain. Understood?"

Despite himself, Roland grinned. "Aye aye, sir."

.

.

.

When Roland and Batu arrived at the hotel, they found Leander and Lofty standing outside, talking quietly with expressions of vague unease. Roland and Batu exchanged a look and hurried over. Leander noticed them first, his eyes alight with sudden hope.

"Roland, Batu, have either of you seen Evan around?" he asked them.

"What do you mean?" Roland demanded, suddenly tense. "Isn't Evan with President Vector?"

"Cor, no Evan here either!" Lofty exclaimed, miffed. "Boy's gone and proper disappeared, like!"

"It is distressing, to say the least," Leander added with a troubled sigh.

"Wait a minute,  _disappeared_?" Roland repeated, horrified.

Leander adjusted his glasses importantly. "I wanted to catch Evan before he retired to sleep to speak with him about the union, but when I found President Vector, Evan was not with him. He informed me that Evan had left for the hotel at least fifteen minutes prior. I came back to the hotel expecting to find him, but I'm afraid he's not here, either. There appears to be no sign of him."

Roland's mind was already forming over a dozen unpleasant scenarios that could be unfolding at this very moment. He pushed down those horrible thoughts in favor of formulating a plan of action.

"Leander, you head uptown. Lofty, get with Bracken and Tani to see if they might have an idea where Evan's gone off to, and if not, you three stay here and keep an eye out for him. Batu, ask around to see if anyone's seen Evan, take note of anyone acting suspicious. I'll take midtown."

There was no argument from anyone. Armed with their assigned tasks and a heck of a lot of concern, they split up and headed their respective ways.

.

.

.

The moment Roland stepped off the lift, he could physically  _feel_ Evan was nearby.

It was a difficult sensation to explain, and Roland wasn't too keen on taking the time to dissect what he was feeling. As he made his way through the throngs of Broadleafers going about their evening routines - grabbing dinner, meeting up with friends - Roland could only identify it as a deep pang in his chest, an unnamed pull that was leading him through the crowd, down the street and past a cafe to an unnoticed alcove behind the staircase to the upper platforms.

The tail end of a conversation floated to Roland from around the corner, though it was hard to hear over the blood pumping wildly in his ears. Evan's voice was the first he heard.

"-am so sorry, but I really must be going. I have friends that I promised to meet, you see, so I-"

"N-no, please! You must stay, I, ah, I can't explain it… I just need you to stay with me! Something about you… L-look, I understand I'm being a little unreasonable, but could you come back to my house?"

"Excuse me! I need to go-"

"No! Please, hear me out! Y-you can't go yet!"

The sight that greeted Roland when he rounded the corner made his heart drop into his stomach. Evan had his back against the wall, his ears flat and his face pink, a hand clutched at his chest. A thin, bespectacled man was looming over him, too close for Roland's comfort, his arms raised with hands firmly splayed against the wall on either side of Evan's head in an obvious effort to dissuade Evan from trying to flee.

Roland didn't bother to issue a warning. He lunged forward and grabbed the strange man by the neck of his shirt, yanking him back and throwing him down. Completely unprepared, the man yelped and landed in a heap. Roland stepped in front of Evan and drew his sword, pointing it at the frazzled man with murderous intent.

"R-roland!" Evan exclaimed in surprise. Roland barely heard him.

"Get out of here," Roland growled furiously. "If I  _ever_ see you approach King Evan again, I swear I'll kill you."

"Roland!" Evan grabbed Roland's arm, hugging it against his chest. "The fault is mine, not his! Please don't threaten to hurt anyone!"

"Yours?" Roland's focus faltered, glancing down at Evan with a puzzled expression. "Evan, this is in no way your fault! This miscreant was clearly harassing you!"

"Y-yes, but-"

"I'm sorry!" the man exclaimed, horrified, "I… I don't know what came over me, okay? I'm really sorry!"

Roland flashed the man a glare that could have easily rivialed Batu's. "Get out of here. Now."

The man needed no other incentive. He scrambled to his feet and hurried away, his face red and his glasses askew. Roland's weapon vanished back into his ring. He turned to Evan, his eyes searching the young king for any signs of injury. Other than looking rather tired, he appeared to be unhurt.

"Evan, are you alright? Did he do anything? Did-"

Before he could finish, Evan flew into Roland's arms, pushing his face into his chest. Roland let out a shaky breath and wrapped the frightened boy in his arms, noticing the faint tremble in Evan's body.

"I'm sorry," Evan choked out, voice muffled. "I… I went back to the hotel, but you weren't there, so I c-came looking. I thought maybe you and the others might have come here to buy some food or supplies, or…"

"Why didn't you just wait?" Roland asked gently, rubbing Evan's back comfortingly.

"I…" Evan pulled away just enough to look up at Roland with round, tearful eyes. "Um, I… I needed to see you. It was rather urgent."

"What could have been so urgent that you-" Roland cut himself off when a sweet, warm scent flooded his senses, driving a knife of desire into his gut and making his brain fuzzy and slow to respond. "Oh." was all he managed.

"Y-yeah."

"Already?" Roland could have smacked himself. "So, that man… He was, ah, pursuing you because of…?"

Evan's face flushed a shade darker. "It… affects some people differently. If I'd known it was so potent, I would have been more careful. Usually grimalkin use medicine to suppress the pheromones so this sort of thing doesn't happen, but… Well, you know."

Roland gently held Evan's face in his hands. "Do you need anything? Are you going to be alright here?"

Evan nodded and shut his eyes, nuzzling his cheek contentedly against Roland's palm. Roland could faintly hear him begin to purr. "It's still early, I think. I'll be fine, I promise. It's just… as soon as I felt it, I wanted to find you. I can't explain why, I just needed for you to be nearby." He smiled sheepishly. "I'm sorry… That must sound terribly odd."

Roland very nearly laughed. "Not at all. Actually, I believe I experienced something similar on my way to find you. It was almost exactly as you described weeks ago… It was like I could sense that you needed me somehow."

Evan's eyes went very round. "Really? Gosh, that's amazing, Roland! I thought it took a lot longer for a bond to form… At least, that's what my father told me."

Roland smiled. "I'm a quick study," he teased.

The soft, sweet smile that lit up Evan's face made something unidentifiable in Roland's chest flutter, and before he could stop himself he was sweeping the boy up into a kiss, one of his hands firmly cradling the back of Evan's head to keep him close, the warmth of Evan's soft lips making his head swim. Evan clutched Roland's jacket and issued a soft moan, his purrs vibrating into Roland's throat as the boy parted his lips to deepen the kiss.  _Bold_ , Roland thought delightedly, along with stray thoughts and ideas of where else Evan could put those warm, soft lips, and how wonderful those sweet vibrations might feel further down, down-

Slightly startled, Roland gently broke their kiss, alarmed at himself for not only kissing Evermore's king in public, (though they did appear to be hidden from view, but Roland hardly considered that an improvement,) but for allowing his mind to wander to such vulgar places. Thankfully his jacket was long enough to cover the unmistakable bulge growing in his pants.

"Sorry, Evan," Roland rasped with a reassuring smile when he noticed Evan's confused - and slightly disappointed - expression. "I got carried away."

Evan shook his head with a soft smile. "M-me too," he admitted with a weak giggle. "I promise to get better at controlling myself in the future." The young king pulled away, laying his arms stiffly at his sides as though he couldn't trust himself not to touch Roland if he wasn't keeping close tabs on them. "Roland, can I ask a, uhm, favor?"

"Of course. Anything." Roland answered, willing his half-erection to go down.

Evan pressed his lips together nervously. "Feel free to, ah, refuse of course, but… Could we… sleep in the same room tonight?" the boy asked cautiously.

It took every ounce of restraint Roland had not to blurt out an immediate 'YES' in a disproportionately loud voice, but somehow he refrained. "I don't have a problem with that, but those 'hotel' rooms are terribly cramped. The rooms are practically coffins."

"Would that be too uncomfortable for you?" Evan asked, face dropping in poorly hidden disappointment.

"It's  _you_ I'm worried about," Roland chuckled. Oh, god, could he really entertain the idea of sleeping together with Evan in a metal pod, breathing in Evan's sweet scent while feeling that smaller body squeezed up against him? Especially after he'd just seen a demonstration of how poor his self-control had become? "You're sure you don't want your own bed?"

Evan blushed and shook his head, lowering his gaze to the ground. "I want to be with you, tonight. I don't think I could sleep alone while feeling this way."

A tight lump formed in Roland's throat. He swallowed it down. "Then we'll sleep together." he promised. Evan's face lit up.

"Really? It's okay?"

"Definitely. Come on, let's head back. Everyone was really worried about you, they'll want to know you're okay."

Evan nodded, his face still adorably rosy. As they started off toward the hotel for the night, Roland's mind thrummed with a mixture of contentment and concern. If it was this difficult to control himself during the early stages of Evan's heat, what in the world did he have to look forward to in a day or two?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, weird story about the hotel featured in this chapter and the next. When I started writing this chapter, I think I was playing through Chapter Six in the game, and I had no idea that Broadleaf even HAD a hotel. So I came up with the idea of a weird “inn” with really cramped, tiny, but efficient rooms. The next day, I was playing the game when a Leafbook notification came up, and what do I see? A picture of Broadleaf’s ‘hotel’, which looks essentially exactly like a more steampunk version of the pod/coffin-style hotels in large Japanese cities. Lemme tell you, that was a very strange coincidence. I only had to change a bit of the wording in the end!
> 
> SMUT IS HAPPENING IN THE NEXT CHAPTER, I PROMISE. (Rating is gonna go way up, too, and tags will be properly updated.) Not that fluff and build-up aren’t good things, but I kinda set out to write a smutty fic, so.


	6. In which a tight space provides an unexpected benefit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Evan helps Roland get ready for bed.

Neither Roland nor Evan made mention to anyone that they were sharing a hotel room. No one except for Lofty, who maturely chose not to point out how inappropriate it was for a King and his Chief Consul to sleep together in a foreign land in a bedroom the size of a ventilation shaft, though Roland suspected it was more to do with Lofty being excited about having a room all to himself, and less to do with Lofty's capacity for subtly.

Fortunately, both Roland and Evan's rooms were on the third floor, so it wasn't terribly suspicious that they went up together. Despite this, Roland swore he could feel Batu's eyes burning into his back as they bid everyone goodnight and made their way upstairs.

The room door was more like the door to a high-security safe than a proper room. Roland pulled the door open for them and allowed Evan to crawl in first, and followed once the boy was safely inside. He shut the heavy door and locked it - for security reasons, it wasn't as though he was looking forward to being locked in a small space with Evan for an entire night - and carefully maneuvered onto the bed, his neck cocked at an unnatural angle to avoid smacking it on the ceiling. Evan was sitting cross-legged on one side of the bed, carefully unfastening his cape and folding it neatly in his lap. For some reason, it hadn't occurred to Roland that they needed to change clothes for bed.

"Is this really okay?" Evan asked quietly, perhaps noticing the way Roland had suddenly frozen in mid-sit. Roland snapped out of his revelation and struggled into a suitable sitting position, finally able to straighten his neck.

"It's more than okay, Evan. There appears to be enough room for the both of us, after all."

Evan smiled in relief. "There's more room horizontally than vertically, isn't there?"

"And good ventilation, thankfully. I was worried that perhaps we'd run low on air, but I should have realized Broadleafers don't cut corners."

Evan nodded and pulled off his belt, setting it next to his cape. He then pulled his shirt over his head, revealing a thin white undershirt with loose, elbow-length sleeves and a low neckline. Roland looked away, a lump forming in his throat and another shameful stirring in his loins. Why was he getting so worked up over something so innocent as Evan's underclothes? He was still suffering the effects of Evan's pheromones, surely.

"Roland, are you going to change for bed?" Evan asked curiously. When Roland turned to face him, he could see that Evan had shuffled out of his slacks and tights, too, leaving him in a cute pair of dark blue pleated shorts with a slit in the back for his tail to fit through. Roland felt his mouth go very dry.

"Ah, yes," Roland answered clumsily, ashamed with himself for being so easily flustered. He turned away again in an effort to block out the sight of Evan wearing such an adorable, loose-fitting outfit, and to focus on holding his rapidly emerging desires at bay. He busied himself with pulling off his belt and starting to unbutton his own jacket, and in so doing, he managed to whack his elbow against the metal wall beside him. He let out a grunt of discomfort, hissing through his teeth.

"Gosh, are you okay?" Evan asked, concerned, and before Roland could reassure him, the young king was suddenly filling up Roland's field of vision, having crawled over to slip effortlessly between Roland's legs. For a fleeting moment, Roland was positive he'd forgotten every word he knew in every language.

"Oh, did you hit your arm?" Evan asked, noticing the way Roland was loosely holding his elbow. Roland slowly nodded, struggling to remember how talking worked.

"It's fine, I'm fine," Roland finally got out, forcing a reassuring smile. "Just a bump, is all."

Evan smiled, relieved. "Oh, thank goodness. Here, let me help. My arms aren't as long as yours," the boy offered with a sweet little laugh, his hands moving to unfasten the buttons on Roland's jacket for him. Roland watched him work, practically mesmerized by Evan's nimble fingers moving over the front of his chest while kneeling between his knees in only a simple shirt and shorts. His long eyelashes were downcast, focused on his task, golden hair endearingly framing his heart-shaped face. He was so beautiful. Did Evan know how beautiful he was? Did he know how tempting his unguarded lips were, or how sweet the exposed skin of his throat and chest looked to kiss and nibble?

Roland shut his eyes tightly, trying to master his own thoughts. He wasn't about to jump all over Evan as soon as he found himself in a compromising position with him, he just  _wasn't_. He wasn't that kind of person. Evan wanted to be near him tonight for comfort's sake, because Roland made him feel safe. How could he be having these sorts of untamed thoughts when the person he cared about needed him? He knew the intoxicating effect of the pheromones were partly responsible for his lapse in self-control, but surely it wasn't entirely to blame. The disturbing truth of it was that Roland truly wanted this, he wanted to explore his own emerging feelings for Evan.

"Roland?" For the umpteenth time, Evan's voice brought Roland back to reality. Roland looked down and realized far too late that Evan had successfully unbuttoned Roland's jacket and pulled it open in an attempt to help Roland shuck it off. In doing so, he'd revealed the damning evidence of Roland's unwilling arousal, and the boy was staring at the straining bulge with wide, curious eyes and partially parted lips. Roland reflexively fell back onto his arms, realizing too late that in this cramped compartment, there was absolutely nowhere to hide.

"Evan,  _good lord_ , I'm so sorry… I honestly don't know what's come over me, I can't even  _begin_ to apologize for my appalling lack of self-control, I-"

"R-roland!" Evan held his hands up in an obvious attempt to stop the onslaught of regret currently pouring out of his Chief Consul. "Roland, it's okay! You don't have to apologize for anything. I told you, didn't I? It's because of my silly pheromones." He lowered his hands, a worried frown shaping his lips. "I'm sorry, this must be really difficult for you, isn't it? I asked to share a room with you, knowing full well how tight the space was."

Roland was first and foremost relieved that Evan wasn't upset with him, but secondly he was surprised beyond words that Evan had somehow taken this turn of events as something  _he'd_ done wrong.

"N-no, Evan, it isn't your fault. It's… no one's fault, I suppose. I just feel awful for not being able to control myself better. You need me to be strong, and I admit I feel anything but."

"You're always strong!" Evan exclaimed passionately. Roland's heart seized with affection. "You're the strongest person I know! Even now, you're doing so much for me even though you don't have to... I l-like you ever so much, Roland!" Evan's face flushed pink. He cast his eyes down, embarrassed. "And… I'm not bothered if you have those sorts of feelings for me. I'm happy, actually."

The last thread of Roland's self-control snapped. He sat forward and held Evan's face in his hands, kissing him soundly on the mouth. Evan let slip a tiny moan of approval, only fanning the flames of Roland's arousal. Roland pulled him in, kissing him deeply, breathlessly, unable to keep in mind how inexperienced Evan still was. He couldn't think anymore. Evan's scent was thoroughly clouding his rationality, or perhaps his desire for Evan had finally reached the point of no return, he wasn't sure.

Evan whimpered into Roland's mouth, parting his lips to allow Roland's tongue inside and experimenting with his own, sucking the invading muscle gently, curling his tongue around Roland's. Everything Evan did was clumsy and slightly unsure and absolutely  _delightful_. Somehow his uncertainty was alluring in its own way.

Evan's knee accidentally brushed against Roland's straining erection, and Roland broke the kiss to issue a low groan, resting his forehead against Evan's for a moment of stability. They needed to stop this. He needed to get his head right, he needed to leave, he needed to-

A small, warm hand gently cupped the bulge in Roland's slacks. Roland's breathing hitched. "Roland, may I, uhm, take care of this for you?"

Roland's attention snapped to Evan in mute surprise, noting the alluring look in the young king's expression, his eyes half lidded and his mouth flushed red from the deep, forceful kiss. A hopeful smile framed the boy's lips as his hand fondled Roland's erection through his pants. "I p-promise to be really careful," Evan added, as though that was an actual concern Roland had in this situation.

Roland nodded, perhaps too eagerly, but Evan didn't seem to mind and Roland was too far gone to worry about it.

It was difficult to undress in such a cramped space and with Evan stubbornly stationed between his legs as he helped the process along, but in moments, Evan had relieved Roland of his slacks and underclothes. Roland couldn't deny he felt oddly exposed, especially with Evan staring at his fully erect cock with such an innocent, wonderous expression, but any and all awkwardness melted away the moment Evan repositioned himself and leaned over Roland's lap, his small hands reaching out to hesitantly wrap around the base of his cock.

Roland couldn't prevent a low groan of approval from spilling out, prompting Evan to glance up at him with wide, surprised eyes.

"Did I do something wrong?" Evan asked, his voice tight, practically a whisper.

Roland offered the boy a strained smile. "No, quite the opposite."

"Really?" Evan looked back down at the warm, slightly throbbing organ. His hands wrapped around the base again, gently, like he was holding something precious and fragile. He pulled his hand up in a slow stroke, gently palming the head. Roland's stomach tightened with pleasure. "I've, uhm, never seen a penis before. O-other than my own, I mean, obviously. It's so big, Roland… So big and warm."

Roland let out a slow, shaky breath. Did Evan have any idea how that kind of talk affected someone? Probably not.

"Is it okay if I put it in my mouth?" Evan asked quietly. Again, Roland replied with a nod.

"Yes, that's fine."

"Is there anything I should know?" Evan asked, one his hands continuing the slow and steady strokes, getting more comfortable with the motion. Despite the pleasure lancing through him at the mere contact, Roland smiled and reached out to gently stroke Evan's cheek. It was disarming how considerate the boy was even now, when he was doing something so incredibly lewd.

"I'm sure you'll do just fine. Take it slow, and go at your own pace. And, ah, be careful of teeth, I suppose I should mention."

Evan nodded, his face the very picture of determination. Adorable.

The boy leaned down again, lower this time, his mildly trembling lips finding the mushroom head of Roland's cock and pressing a kiss to it before taking the tip into his mouth, enveloping Roland's head in velvety warmth. It took everything Roland had not to come right then and there.

"Evan…" Groaning Evan's name in pleasure was strange, but Roland was confident he could get used to it. Evan seemed to be encouraged by it if anything, his lips sliding another inch of Roland's cock into his mouth, his tongue pressed flat against the underside as though he wasn't sure how to move his lips and tongue at the same time. Which he most likely didn't, of course. This was his first blowjob. Another spike of pleasure surged into Roland's loins at the thought. His cock was the first Evan had ever tasted, and soon, it would be the first cock to enter him, as well. The first to satiate his heat. Something in Roland's muddled mind added, possessively, ' _the first and the last_ '. Roland was too fuzzy-minded to argue the point.

Any thoughts he had flew far, far away when Evan began to suck, gently at first, dragging his lips down a couple more inches before pulling back up and repeating. He was learning to use his tongue, sweeping it over the tip before he plunged back down, unable to take more than half of Roland's length before pulling back up.

"You're doing so well, Evan," Roland managed to say through the haze of pleasure, petting Evan's head between his ears and smoothing his fingers through the boy's soft hair. "Just like that… Y-yes, that's it. You're so amazing, Evan. You feel so good."

Evan's mouth halted for just a moment, flustered, but he began again with new vigor, his tail swaying and twitching behind him, his throat rumbling with delighted purrs.

The purring. Oh god, the  _purring_.

Every deep purr sent potent vibrations through Roland's cock down to the root, intensifying everything tenfold. Roland absently scratched Evan behind his ears, fingertips grabbing at the boy's hair, trying hard not to grab the boy by the back of his head and force more of his cock into that beautiful, sweet mouth.

"Evan, I think I'm going to…  _haah_ , I'm going to come, so-"

Evan tilted his chin up just enough for their eyes to meet, and Roland's breathing hitched at the erotic picture presented to him. Evan's eyes were glazed over with arousal, brow knit adorably in concentration, his small hands working the shaft while his mouth sweetly gobbled the head of Roland's cock with no intention of pulling away. That was all it took.

Roland came with a grunt, holding tight to the back of Evan's head as he emptied his seed into the boy's waiting mouth. Evan whimpered softly as each thick spurt splashed over his tongue, his lips firmly circled around Roland's cock until every last drop was spent.

The clouds that had ensnared Roland's mind finally began to clear. He watched Evan finally pull his flushed lips from Roland's cock with a slick pop, his throat working in visible swallows. The boy released a shaky sigh once he'd swallowed it all, and glanced up at Roland with a rosy, sleepy smile.

"W-was that good?" Evan asked, still purring.

Roland's entire body felt limp and useless, his exhaustion from the day finally hitting him. He somehow maintained the clarity to pull his underclothes back up.

"It was amazing, Evan. You were amazing."

Evan giggled. "I'm glad."

"Are you alright, though?" Roland asked him worriedly. He reached out to hold Evan's face in his hands. "After all you've gone through today, I feel like you went out of your way for me."

Evan shook his head, still smiling. "It wasn't any trouble. Besides, I wanted to."

"Do you need… ah…. Something?" Roland asked, his eyes glancing down at Evan's shorts for clarification. "I can't help but feel that it's unfair of me not to take care of you, like you have for me."

Evan placed his hands over Roland's. "It's okay! I'm fine, really. There will be plenty of time for that in a couple of days. I'm not quite there yet, so I'm not in pain or anything… I just wanted to do something nice for you. I wanted to… uhm, I wanted to make you feel g-good."

The idea of 'plenty of time' in of itself was almost enough to get Roland hard again, but fortunately his body was too tired to entertain anything beyond pulling Evan into his arms and flopping down on the bed with him, which he did, of course, to Evan's delight.

Roland kissed the crown of Evan's head, and Evan responded by nuzzling his face into Roland's collarbone, humming contentedly. They stayed that way - cuddling and occasionally kissing and petting - until the day finally caught up with Evan and he fell deeply asleep. Careful so as not to wake him, Roland reached up and clicked the overhead light off, plunging them into peaceful darkness. He pulled Evan close and shut his eyes, feeling his own exhaustion creeping ever closer.

Could something like this really last? After all he'd lost - after all they'd  _both_ lost, could Roland really expect to hang on to this happiness? He wasn't sure. All he knew for certain was that right now, he didn't want to let go of the boy in his arms. Not for anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flustered!Roland is my new favorite thing. It won’t last for much longer, though. B) 
> 
> I HAVE SO MANY POST-GAME IDEAS FOR FLUFFY CHAPTERS. Should I just post them in this fic after I'm done posting the main 'story'? (Which is just basically. heat sex.) Let me know! I don't really want to post a whole new work just to delve into post-game stuff, so tell me how long ya'll want this thing to be lol (Otherwise it will end at chapter 8)


	7. In which fear and desire are ever-changing beasts of the same color

King Evan's entourage departed Broadleaf in the early morning, and they arrived in Evermore late at night. Somewhere in the middle of their trip home, Roland observed with growing concern that much of the male crew had begun to behave somewhat restlessly around Evan, seeking him out for mundane, unclear reasons, their hands shaking and their eyes dilating when they looked at him. When Roland could no longer tolerate the obvious lust in their intentions, he took Evan aside and suggested Evan wait below deck until they were safely back in Evermore. Evan agreed wholeheartedly. They both knew Evan's heat was fast approaching, and his body was pumping out a ridiculous amount of pheromones. Evan didn't like the unwanted advances any more than Roland did.

Roland was pleased to note that Evan's alluring scent was no longer skewing his senses. He supposed that the longer he was exposed to it, the more control he would have over his actions in the future. Or perhaps breathing in Evan's sweet scent in a tight, enclosed space for nearly nine hours had temporarily desensitized him.

Regardless of his personal resistance to Evan's literal charms, Roland knew that until the tonic to help suppress the symptoms of heat became readily available for animalfolk again, this was something both he and Evan were going to be extra vigilant about.

Upon arriving in Evermore, Roland made escorting Evan to the castle - his private rooms, more specifically - his top priority. Even the castle guards tilted up their heads to sniff the air curiously as Evan passed by. Roland resisted the temptation to tell each and every one of them off. Despite no longer being overly influenced by Evan's scent, he certainly seemed to be growing more and more possessive by the hour. Was it because Evan's heat was so near?

It was a relief, to say the least, when Evan was safely in his own room. Roland remained standing in the doorway as Evan crossed the room, flopping onto his bed with a giant sigh.

"Thank goodness!" Evan cried with a breathless laugh. "I'm really not doing my subjects any favors by going out in my current state."

Roland smiled fondly, crossing his arms over his chest. "You can hardly help it, your Majesty. You are the King of a new country. Not to mention, the looming danger of Dorolan at our doorstep."

Evan remained laying with his arms spread wide, his eyes closed and a sad smile on his lips. "I know. Until I can secure monthly doses of medicine to stifle these affects, I suppose I'll just have to be extra careful for a few days out of the month."

"At risk of making you uncomfortable, I wouldn't be surprised if some of your subjects and advisors start putting two and two together after they notice your monthly scheduled disappearances."

Evan's eyes opened suddenly, his brows knit in concern. "It must be so difficult for all animalfolk outside of Ding Dong Dell, right now. I wish there was something I could do."

Roland rubbed his chin in thought. "Perhaps we should form a research team at the Hubbly Bubbly to look into a way to replicate the tonic all of you need. They might be able to work something out."

Evan sat up, his lips parted in inspiration. "Roland, that's a marvelous idea! I… I feel like I should have thought of that myself."

"You've had a lot more pressing matters to tackle lately. And may I point out, you're not presently in the clearest state of mind."

Evan smiled, embarrassed. "Can… can you tell? Is it getting obvious?"

"You're skin is warm to the touch, and you've been out of breath since mid-afternoon." Roland pointed out. He turned to grab the doorknob. "Which reminds me-"

"Y-you're not leaving, are you?" Evan asked suddenly, his voice uncharacteristically frightened. Roland felt terrible for evoking that fear in Evan, the fear of being abandoned when he needed his mate the most.

"No, of course not," Roland assured him calmly. "At least, not for long. I have a few things to check on since arriving back, and I need to collect some things from my room. Ahh," He cleared his throat, offering Evan an awkward grin, "that is, I was planning on staying with you for a couple of days, or at least until your heat passes. Is that alright with you?"

Evan listened to Roland with wide eyes and a pink face. After a moment, he covered his face in his hands, much like he had weeks ago when he'd confessed his feelings for Roland in the first place.

"T-that's just fine," Evan murmured, giggling softly into his palms. "Yeah. I would really like that." He lowered his hands. "Sorry for, uhm, jumping to strange conclusions."

Roland stepped into the room, leaning over to plant a soft kiss to the boy's forehead. "Don't apologize. This is still very new, and you're in a vulnerable position where you have to depend solely on another person for your safety and comfort. That's a frightening prospect. But I promise I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to be right here."

Evan's eyes glistened with emotion, and his shoulders jerked with a tight, relieved sob. He threw his arms around Roland's neck, hugging him tightly, and Roland unhesitatingly hugged him back just as tightly. From the way his body was shaking, Roland could tell he'd hit the nail on the head. Evan was terrified. Roland knew the feeling. Not being in control of your own body or your own thoughts… It wasn't a sensation anyone particularly enjoyed, let alone someone with so much responsibility resting on their young shoulders.

Roland pulled away, gently sweeping Evan's bangs aside to feel his forehead. He seemed to be getting warmer by the moment, and his eyes were definitely beginning to look more dilated.

"I'll return shortly," Roland promised, cupping Evan's warm cheek in his hand, "Don't worry about anything, alright? Just get comfortable and try to relax. I'll be back before you know it."

Evan's sweet, trusting smile pulled at Roland's heart and made him want to forget leaving altogether. "I'll be here." he answered.

.

.

.

First and foremost, Roland needed to ensure that Evan's impending absence wasn't going to raise concern. To Evan's friends and advisors, he explained that Evan had come down with something nasty and would be recovering in his room. It was impossible to ignore the suspiciously thoughtful expression on Leander's face, but thankfully Lofty stepped in to rather loudly and confidently suggest that Roland look after Evan. Although this suggestion seemed to satisfy Leander, Bracken and Tani, Batu's jaw clenched with tension and he glowered at Roland with daggers in his eyes. Inwardly, Roland shuddered. If Batu knew even a tenth of what was really going on, Roland had no doubt he would already have been ripped soundly in half.

Next came delegating tasks and duties. With both Evan and Roland out of commission for the next couple of days or more, there were quite a few things to get in order, but thankfully Leander took over as organizer and insisted Roland see to Evan, to ensure he was alright. If Roland hadn't known better, he might have assumed Leander had picked up on what was going on to some extent. Roland never expected to pull the wool over Leander's eyes for too terribly long; he knew that at some point, he, Evan or both of them were going to have to tell their friends the truth. In the meantime, he intended to wait until Evan was comfortable sharing something like that.

Roland's next stop was his own chambers, to grab some extra clothes for his extended stay in Evan's room. He pulled a traveling bag from under his bed and checked the contents thoroughly before stuffing in an extra set of clothes; inside the bag was a small jar of oil, several bottles of wonderwater, and a tightly-packed pouch of dehydrated meat, fruit and vegetables.

In hindsight, perhaps it was a bit odd to have done research on heat sex - grimalkin heat sex in particular - but Goldpaw's library was only a tripdoor away, and Roland always felt more comfortable going into an unfamiliar situation armed with as much information as possible. In the end, he was fortunate that Boddly had an 'adult' section in which to research these things in the first place. (A fact that had surprised him precisely not one bit.)

He wanted Evan to be safe. That was all that mattered.

Roland returned to Evan's room to find the young king sitting in his armchair with his knees pulled to his chest, dressed in soft-colored nightclothes and holding an open book out in front of him. Upon hearing Roland enter he lowered his book, flashing Roland a smile.

"You're back," Evan said sweetly, his voice a touch more throaty than it had been an hour ago.

Roland closed the door, locking it behind him and setting down his bag. "Sorry if I made you wait for too long," he answered, pulling off his jacket and laying it neatly beside his bag.

Evan shook his head. "Don't apologize, I was fine here by myself."

"What are you reading?" Roland asked curiously, stealing the armchair opposite Evan.

"I'm not," Evan laughed, though he was beginning to look rather shaky and red-faced. He shut the book and laid it on the table beside him. "It's more like I was trying to read, but not getting anywhere. It's getting hard to focus."

Asking whether or not Evan was 'ready' seemed like a tactless move. "Are you feeling alright?" Roland settled on instead.

Evan hugged his knees tightly against his chest. "Ah, it's… hard to say. I'm not in pain or anything. I'm feeling itchy, I suppose. Itchy, hot and tired."

Roland rubbed his chin. "Like you're feeling uncomfortable in your own skin?"

Evan's eyes rose to meet Roland's in surprise. "Yes! How did you know?"

Admitting he'd read a medical text about grimalkin sexuality also seemed fairly tactless. And slightly creepy. "Just a guess."

Evan smiled. "Have you ever felt like that?"

Roland opened his mouth to reply, closed it, considered, and then tried again. "I suppose I'd be lying if I said I've never felt something like that, before. Though I certainly can't claim to know what you're going through right now." Noting the way Evan's eyelids were beginning to droop, Roland stood and walked to the bed, pulling the blankets back. "We should get some sleep, don't you think? It's been a long day."

"Mm. S-sounds good."

Slowly, Evan stretched out his legs and went to stand, but very quickly Roland noticed him stumble and catch himself on the table. Concerned, Roland rushed to his side, a hand braced on Evan's shoulder.

"Are you alright?"

"Ah, haah," Evan's chest was rising and falling rapidly, his legs trembling, barely holding him. "Y-yes. I'm sorry, this happened last month, too. I just got really weak, and it was hard to get around. It didn't last very long."

"Don't apologize," Roland gently admonished, scooping the boy up into his arms and carrying him to the bed. He set him down, helping him crawl under the sheets. "This is why I'm here, remember?"

Evan smiled weakly. "To assist me in staying upright?" he asked playfully, though Roland could hear the traces of insecurity in his voice.

"To be here for you," Roland corrected him gently, leaning down to kiss Evan between his brows. "Because I care very much about you."

Evan flushed rose. "I'm sorry. I keep saying strange things, don't I?"

"Not at all." Roland rubbed Evan between his ears, earning him a sweet smile and a content purr. "Is there anything you need right now?"

Evan's breathing was steadily becoming more uneven. Sweat was beginning to bead at his hairline. "Ah, would you stay close to me? T-that's all I need."

Without any further prompting, Roland slipped into bed beside Evan, opening his arms in an invitation to come near. Evan's face lit up in a soft smile and he shuffled in close, nuzzling his head against Roland's chest.

In moments, he was asleep. Roland followed soon after, his exhaustion from the previous two days catching up with him at last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little calm before the storm, if you know what I mean ;) 
> 
> There is a strong chance that someone in the cast Knows What's Up, and there's an equally strong chance that person is Leander
> 
> I got the platinum trophy for 100% completion yesterday!! Which I'm super happy about, but also kind of sad about because I've done everything there is to do in the game now :( Time to finally play some ESO! I was playing it on PC a couple of years ago, but there a ton of new content so I'm pretty excited. :3


	8. In which a king and his chief consul reach the point of no return

Roland slowly opened his eyes, immediately sensing that something in the room had changed. Nothing felt wrong, exactly, just different. Like the atmosphere had shifted somehow. The candle on the bedside table had long snuffed out, leaving the bedroom drenched in darkness with a slice of moonlight beaming in through the tall window, falling over the bed.

" _Haah_ …  _Ngh_.."

His chest was warm. Roland glanced down, noticing first that his shirt had been unbuttoned and pulled open, and realizing second that Evan was hovering over him, licking and kissing his chest, his breath hot and coming out in rough pants and gasps. One of his hands was shoved down the front of his own shorts, stroking and rubbing his sex desperately. His eyes were shining in the moonlight, glazed over with arousal, his tongue lapping at Roland's chest almost as though he were being driven by some nameless force. Which he was, of course.

"Evan?" Roland spoke gently, not wanting to startle him. There was no response aside from a low, mindless moan that was not likely related to Roland's inquiry. "Evan, can you hear me?"

On the second attempt, Evan appeared to come back. He froze, his eyes finding Roland's and holding his gaze for several moments, his body shaking, his hand burning hot on Roland's chest.

"Ah… Roland…"

Roland sat up, forcing Evan to sit up with him. "It's time, is it?" Roland asked him carefully. "Are you alright?"

Evan squirmed in discomfort, his eyes still glued to Roland's face, his lips parted to allow shallow gasps. "Roland… It itches, it hurts, I  _need_ something..." He shook his head, finally breaking eye-contact to stare down at Roland's lap with purpose, "N-no, not just something, I need Roland's d-dick… Please, I need it inside,  _inside, please_ …"

Hearing those words spoken by such a sweet and pure young man in such a breathless, wanton voice made Roland's mouth go dry and his loins pulse with need. At the same time it alarmed him. He knew Evan would behave differently, but  _this_ … It was like this Evan was an entirely separate person from the sleepy, slightly insecure boy he'd cuddled up with hours ago.

Before he could further consider the implications, Evan had moved into his lap and slid his arms around Roland's neck, pulling him in for a hot, deep kiss. If Roland had been able to think properly, it might have been embarrassing how quickly he succumbed to the boy's insistence. Roland grabbed Evan's waist and kissed him deeply, swallowing the boy's moans, his fingers slipping under Evan's shirt to trace gently over his heated skin. In reply Evan shamelessly ground his hips down against Roland's rapidly growing arousal, successfully chipping away at Roland's self-restraint. Not that there was much left to begin with.

In moments, Roland flipped the both of them over, pinning Evan under him. He pulled their lips apart and mouthed Evan's jaw, traveling down his slender neck to finally taste the pale, flawless skin he'd been shamelessly ogling in that metal coffin back in Broadleaf. Evan gasped in appreciation and clawed at Roland's shoulders, his bottom half still squirming impatiently. Roland's mouth sucked and kissed, his mind falling into that blissful cloud of nonsense that usually accompanied a potent wave of Evan's pheromones; his vision practically flickered when his nose ran over a particular patch of skin just under where Evan's ear would be, had he human ears. Evan's sweet, warm scent seemed to be especially potent there, and almost as a reflex, Roland moved his mouth over the tender patch of skin and pressed a kiss there.

The reaction from Evan was immediate and explosive. Evan moaned and gripped Roland's shoulders so tightly it nearly hurt. "R-roland,  _pleaase_ , yes yes  _yessss_ ," the young king groaned helplessly, tilting his head to give Roland more access to his neck. Somewhere in Roland's clouded mind he recalled reading about this, about the how sensitive a grimalkin's scent glands could be during a heat. Evan was only half grimalkin, so it was hard to predict where his scent glands might be; judging by his pleasured cries, Roland had found one.

Roland pulled one of Evan's hands from his shoulder and pinned it above the boy's head, running his tongue gently over the sensitive patch of skin, revelling in Evan's frantic moans and broken pleading before covering the area with his lips and sucking gently. Evan's back arched off the bed and he cried out in unmistakeable bliss. Roland pulled away and regarded the boy underneath him, surprised, noting the growing patch of wetness in Evan's shorts. He came, just from that? Of course he did, Roland supposed, Evan was in heat. His body was insanely sensitive right now, his every sense enhanced, every pleasure amplified ten-fold. Roland's mind reeled. Something primal pushed itself into his brain, borrowing his senses, making him burn with almost animalistic possessiveness. He wanted to make Evan feel good. He wanted to make Evan come over and over again until he forgot his own name, he wanted to come inside him until he couldn't spend another drop.

"Please… Roland,  _please_ …" Despite having already orgasmed, Evan's desire didn't seem to have diminished one bit. Roland ran his hand down Evan's small chest, down his taut stomach, coming to rest on the wet tent in the boy's pants. He slipped his fingers under the hem of his shorts and gently pulled them down and off, flinging them in a crumpled heap beside the bed. Evan's shirt followed suit.

Evan's penis bobbed and twitched in the cool night air, still dribbling pearl-white come, flushed red with arousal. Roland let out a shaky breath, slowly spreading open Evan's thighs in an attempt to better see the area of his desire. To his surprise, Evan's thighs were soaked with a clear, slick substance that appeared to be flooding from his entrance.  _Natural lubricant_ , Roland mused,  _I suppose I brought oil for nothing, then. Perhaps the book wasn't as informative as I'd hoped._

"Roland," Evan's broken voice snapped Roland from his trance and Roland glanced up to meet the boy's eyes, surprised to see Evan's face was completely red, burning with embarrassment. "D-don't just stare, t-touch me already."

Roland couldn't stop himself from grinning. "I'm surprised you're thinking clearly enough to be self-conscious right now."

Evan buried his face in his hands. "I-I'm not, it's…  _ahh_ …"

"I know," Roland murmured, kissing Evan's inner thigh, "Don't worry. I promise I'm going to make you feel really good, Evan. I'll keep the pain away."

"That's….  _Aaah_!" Evan's back bowed again when Roland closed his mouth over the tip of Evan's leaking dick. How did every inch of Evan taste so sweet? Roland gently sucked the boy's petite length, his tongue swirling over the tip as though he'd done this a hundred times. (Which for the record, he hadn't.) Somehow, despite his own inexperience in this particular practice, Roland knew exactly what to do and how to do it. More specifically, he knew how to pleasure Evan. The same part of him that had taken the reigns on his self-control knew how to touch the king's body in exactly the right way, knew every inch of him as though he'd made love to him countless times. Roland didn't question it. His mouth worked its way along Evan's twitching dick until the boy screamed, his body freezing and locking in release, expelling warm spunk into Roland's mouth. Roland swallowed it all, savoring the sweet, delicious flavor, noting the fresh wave of slick that flooded from Evan's hole.

Roland pulled his mouth from the boy's cock, watching the smaller body beneath him gasp and heave in ecstasy. In the darkness, bathed only in moonlight and surrounded by waves of satin sheets, Evan looked unbelievably gorgeous. A starlit angel.

"God, you're beautiful," Roland breathed, unable to stop himself. "You're so beautiful, Evan."

For a beat, Evan's eyes seemed to refocus, and his mouth fell open in something other than a pleasured moan. He reached up and pulled Roland back down into an urgent kiss, one which Roland grateful reciprocated. He slipped a hand down Evan's slim body and sought out his pucker, sliding a finger into Evan's impossibly wet, tight heat. Evan groaned into Roland's mouth, his bottom half squirming and his legs spreading wide to allow Roland easier access. Their mouths broke apart, every inch of Evan shaking violently with need.

"R-roland…  _Please_ , more, fill me  _more_ ,  _please_ …!"

"Your Majesty is so greedy," Roland gently teased, slipping another finger needlessly inside Evan's tight channel. Evan was plenty wet enough to take him in; it seemed grimalkin bodies were designed to require very little preparation. Roland couldn't argue with that, he absolutely couldn't.

Roland withdrew his fingers and unbuttoned his pants, releasing his straining erection. He couldn't ever remember being so hard that it physically  _hurt_ , but Roland truly felt if he didn't fill Evan with his seed soon, he might lose whatever was left of his senses. Roland grabbed Evan's thighs and spread them apart, pushing his legs back to expose the boy's soaked entrance. He lined himself up, the tip of his cock kissing the young king's pucker, using every ounce of control he had left to keep from immediately sheathing himself inside the wet, welcoming space. Evan gasped and clawed at the bedsheets, his breathing erratic, murmuring desperate pleas under his breath.

"Are you sure you're ready, Evan?" Roland couldn't help but grate out, knowing full well that Evan's body was ready as it could ever be. Despite his every other sense burning with the desire to fuck and breed, he was resolute in ensuring Evan's safety and comfort.

" _Yes_!" Evan cried out hoarsely, his eyes shimmering with anticipation. " _Please_ , Roland, I need you so b-badly I fear I might go insane!"

That was all the convincing Roland needed before his mind promptly shut down and his depraved desires wholly consumed him.

Roland's hips snapped forward, his cock sinking into Evan's blessed heat almost half-way. The sound that came from Evan was something Roland had never heard before; it was somewhere between a scream of pleasure and a cry of joy, as though he'd finally been awarded something long denied him. Roland's eyes squeezed shut and he stole a gulp of air into his dry throat.

"G-god, Evan... You feel too good, how do you feel  _so good_ …?"

" _Roland_ …  _aah_ ,  _Roland_ …!" Evan reached his arms out needily, and Roland immediately covered Evan's body with his own, sinking deeper still, allowing Evan to wrap his trembling arms tightly around his neck. Roland kissed his neck, his jaw, his chin, his lips, still trying to adjust to the feeling of being encompassed by Evan's intoxicatingly tight sex.

" _Please_ ," Evan moaned helplessly as Roland licked and nipped at the scent gland on his neck, "p-please oh  _please_ , mo-more,  _aah_ , I need more…!"

Roland's body responded to Evan before his mind got the chance. His hips snapped forward and he buried himself balls deep inside Evan's convulsing hole, feeling the small body underneath him writhe in ecstasy, back bending up to meet him. Roland's mind fell entirely blank, filled only with thoughts of Evan, his scent, his desperate moans, the intoxicating warmth and pliability of his moonlit skin. It was too much. It wasn't enough. It was like nothing Roland ever knew, and everything he never knew he needed.

All he'd been through, everything Roland had ever done in his life, it was all meant to bring him here. To Evan. Somewhere in his muddy, pleasure-clouded mind, he knew that to be an absolute certainty.

Evan clawed at his back, dragging long, heavy gasps and moans through his teeth. Roland had intended to be gentle, he'd planned it all out, but just now he couldn't fathom it. He anchored his arms on either side of Evan's head and fucked into him with powerful, long thrusts, sweat beading at his brow, his eyes open and watching Evan unravel beneath him. Evan lifted his waist and hooked his ankles behind Roland's thighs to drive him deeper, to keep him close, to make sure he didn't let up for even a moment. Roland couldn't even if he'd still had the clarity of mind to consider it. Every fiber of his being demanded that he fill Evan full of his seed, that he claim the space inside of him so thoroughly that the boy would never forget his shape.

" _Roland_ …  _Roland_ …" Evan gasped his name as though he were possessed, clinging to him as he was pounded into, tears rolling over his rosy cheeks. "Roland, I love you! I -  _aah, haah_  - I l-love you so much, I…  _Aah_!"

Roland had to bite down on his own bottom lip to keep from coming immediately. He pulled Evan up into his arms, repositioning his hips so that Evan was settled in his lap. Evan immediately sank back down onto Roland's length, shivering in pleasure, his thighs tightly clamping Roland's waist. Roland locked his arms behind Evan's back and fucked him deep, pressing his face into Evan's neck, tracing his teeth over that magical spot that made Evan  _wail_. He thought he could feel a possessive growl form in his throat, but the way Evan's insides were pulsing and clenching around him cast away any concerns he might have had over such an alarming impulse.

It was not much longer for either of them. Roland's thrusts broke rhythm and became frantic, rutting, Evan's hoarse cries and moans close to his ear as the boy orgasmed again, ropes of come splattering over their stomachs. Roland grabbed Evan's hips and plunged as deeply as he could, coming with a deep groan. Evan wound his arms around Roland's neck and let out a trembling keen, his body shaking and seizing in pleasure as his insides greedily squeezed Roland's cock of every thick, translucent drop. They stayed that way for a long, breathless moment, Roland's cock still buried deep inside, Evan still clinging to him as though Roland were an anchor keeping him from falling.

Reality and clarity came back to Roland as he got his breath back. He was immediately assaulted with concern and guilt, concern for being too rough and careless with Evan during the boy's first time, and guilt for all the same reasons plus the constant nagging reminder of their glaring age difference. Roland pressed a kiss to Evan's neck, breathing in his sweet scent.

"Are you alright?" Roland asked gently, stroking the boy's back in soothing circles. "I- I lost control. I went too far too fast… I apologize."

Evan uttered a tired giggle, nuzzling his face into Roland's shoulder. "Mm-mm, you have nothing to apologize for," he assured hoarsely, smiling against Roland's skin. "I wanted it all. You didn't do anything I didn't enjoy, I promise. I  _needed_ that."

Roland let out a small breath of relief, ghosting his lips over Evan's scent gland just to feel the way it made him shiver. "I'm glad." He pulled away enough to regard Evan's rosy face, wiping some of the messy tears from the young king's cheeks and chin. "Going by the full, coherent sentences you're using, is it safe to say some of the clouds have cleared? And the pain?"

Evan smiled, his eyes still sharply dilated but still looking much less delirious than before. "I feel much better. I… feel warm and tingly, now. I don't have a lot of experience with, uhm, you know-"

" _Any_  of this?"

Evan giggled again, covering his mouth with his knuckles. "Right, that. But I think it all might come back. The, um, the pain and the… the incoherence. I'll stop being myself again. It might go on for days, and-"

Roland caught Evan's mouth in a kiss, slow and deep, pulling away only when he felt each and every muscle in Evan's body relax. He held the boy's face in his hands. "Don't worry, I know. I'm staying with you until it's over, remember? You have me for as long as you need me."

"Really?" Evan asked, barely above a whisper. "This isn't a bother? You really want to be here, right? With me?"

Roland realized it wasn't ever usually a good idea to make bold proclamations in the afterglow when the passion was still so strong and the mind was still so muddled with sentiment, but he also knew he'd be lying to both Evan and himself if he didn't fess up. He met Evan's eyes and held his gaze, tracing his thumb gently over the boy's cheekbone. "I love you, Evan," he said gently, catching the immediate thrill in Evan's eyes, the glimmer of relief and joy that fell over him. "I want to be here because I love you."

Evan's mouth quirked in a shy smile, but his eyes shone with renewed hunger. He wiggled his hips in Roland's lap, Roland's softening cock quickly twitching back to life inside of his young mate.

"If that's the case, how do you feel about going for round two?" the boy purred, tail flicking mischievously.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And then they went for a round 3, then round 4, then round 5… Roland’s gonna need a looooot of buffs to keep up
> 
> Fun fact about me: I love the concept of sex scenes, I love to plan them out and think about them in detail, but actually writing them takes me 2.5 millions years of procrastination and then another seven-hundred thousand years to even write the damn thing. Why do I even do this to myself??? 
> 
> This was originally going to be the last chapter, but my ideas for the fic have somewhat expanded, so there will be a few more. When we get to post-game stuff I'll be sure to update tags and give you guys a heads-up. Spoilers for Chapter 7 in the next chapter!


	9. In which Leander requests Roland's help with an important matter

For two days, Roland barely left Evan's room. In all honesty, he barely left Evan's  _presence_ , and even during the rare moments he needed to leave to replenish their supply of water and food or ensure everything in Evan's kingdom was running smoothly, he had to fight against an almost immovable instinct to stay close to Evan at all times. It was difficult to ignore, but so was their lacking supply of water and food. Hydration was important when there was so much perspiration going on. Roland may not be from this world, but somehow or other his newfound bond with Evan had blessed him with enhanced stamina and a much more demanding libido than he ever remembered having, even as a horny, reckless teenager.

"Roland? Do you have a moment?"

Roland stopped and turned at the sound of Leander's voice, watching Hydropolis's future king stride down the hall toward him. For a moment Roland worried he might still smell strongly of Evan - or more worriedly, the things he and Evan had been getting up to for the better part of two days - but he reminded himself that he'd showered no less than three times before leaving Evan's room.

"Sure." Roland answered with a smile. "Is everything alright?"

Leander adjusted his glasses. "Of course. I simply hoped I might ask your assistance with something none too urgent. Is Evan well?"

"He's resting. Out like a light." Roland said, which was absolutely not a lie, "But he's feeling much better. I'm sure he'll be back in business in a couple of days. I was just fetching him some things he might need, soup and water, mostly."

Leander smiled. "I'm relieved he's feeling better. And that he's so well looked after, as well. If you're in a hurry, my matter can wait-"

"I'm sure I can help, depending on what you need." Roland said, waving his hand dismissively, though something in his mind urgently hissed at him to deny Leander, to get back to Evan as quickly as he was able. "I wasn't kidding when I said Evan was out like a light. What was it you needed?"

"Ah, yes. I had some concerns about the structural integrity of the Kingmaker's Cathedral. Do you have time to come and take a look?"

There were two things that struck Roland as unusual. Foremost, Roland was absolutely not a suitable individual to ask about the structural integrity of a bookshelf let alone a cathedral, and Roland suspected Leander knew this just as well as he did. Secondly, and possibly more importantly, Roland knew that Leander was no more qualified than  _he_ was in matters of building or architecture, which could only mean that this wasn't about structural integrity at all. And since Leander rarely said what he didn't mean, that meant someone or something was deterring Leander from saying what needed to be said. Meaning simply, of course, that it wasn't safe to speak freely.

Every nerve inside of him ignited with protective tension, though not a shred of it showed on his face.

"That sounds serious," Roland answered with an air of concern. "I'd be happy to check it out, if you think it would help."

.

.

.

Roland couldn't help but squint in the sunlight. Though he was glad to see it again, almost two days in Evan's dimly lit bedroom had left him overly sensitive to the sun's welcoming brilliance. The gardens surrounding the cathedral were as beautiful as ever, flowers growing in bright bunches of color that surrounded the crystal clear pond at the center of the gardens, freshwater fish swimming languidly at the top of the water as a pair of grimalkin children tossed them bits of bread and cheese.

"So," Roland began, relieved when he and Leander wandered further into the shade, "there are spies here in Evermore, and they've set up surveillance equipment in the castle? You called them 'eyes'?"

"Precisely." Leander sighed, walking with his arms crossed over his chest, "It is a magic that is rather familiar to me, for obvious reasons. It was safest to tell you all of this here at the cathedral, since I'd fully scouted the area and found no sign of the spying eyes around. They appear to be exclusively in the castle. For now, at least."

"How far into the castle do you think they've penetrated?" Roland asked, a sudden worry sparking in his mind, a worry that involved Evan's private quarters and the even more private activities that had gone on inside as of late.

"I can't say for certain, but they don't appear to have gone much further than the throne room, and a few other highly accessible areas just beyond." he said, and then added, as if reading Roland's mind, "I do not think any of our private chambers have been breached as of yet."

 _Thank every god in every world,_  Roland thought, though he knew he wouldn't completely relax until he could search Evan's room himself. "Well, well. I can't especially say I'm surprised. I knew Mausinger would send spies sooner or later. What do you propose we do?"

Leander folded his hands behind his back, glancing up at the hanging foliage thoughtfully. "Expose the spy, of course. However, with Evan still…. Indisposed, I fear we may need to take matters into our own hands if we are to act soon."

Roland rubbed his chin, a memory from a few months prior pulling to the foremost of his thoughts, of something Evan had told him regarding the Mark of Kings. A plan began to piece itself together, and Roland stopped walking, frowning down at the cobblestone pathway in thought.

"Unless you had something else in mind, naturally," Leander mused, turning to regard Roland with interest.

"I think I just might," Roland murmured, his mind still buzzing. "It might be tricky to pull off, but I think we could kill two birds with one stone, or so the saying goes."

Leander blinked at him, horrified. "That's an awful saying," he remarked.

.

When Roland was finished relaying his plan, he could already tell that Leander was filling in the gaps by the way his brow was furrowed, and the number of times he had needlessly pushed his glasses further up the bridge of his nose.

"Nothing short of brilliant," Leander murmured after a while, rubbing his chin.

Roland nodded. "It won't be easy, but if it works, we'll sniff out the spy and we'll have also secured our way into Ding Dong Dell."

"As I said. Brilliant." Leander glanced at Roland with a serious expression. "However, I feel I must ask… Are you certain you will be comfortable lying to Evan? This will hurt him, you know."

If Roland hadn't already been stewing on that horrible fact, he'd be a monster. But he couldn't very well ignore the first real chance they'd been awarded to secure the Mark of Kings, either. "Of course not, but it has to be done." Roland pointed out.

"I only ask because of the… unusual situation at hand." Leander pressed on, his voice lowering in volume. "Forgive my brashness, but I worry what sort of effect this might have on Evan, considering the rather potent mating bond you have formed with him."

There was a mutual silence between the men. Roland broke it by clearing his throat.

"I suppose I should be surprised that you caught on, but if you hadn't by now, I might be disappointed." he said with a half-grin.

Leander smiled, seemingly glad that Roland wasn't upset with him for having made mention. "I'm not interested in embarrassing King Evan by bringing attention to this, of course, but it was hard to miss. Evan is a bit young to be going into heat - which is the only reason I suspect others haven't yet realized - but I identified the symptoms last month. Even if I hadn't, it was impossible to ignore his state upon returning to Evermore."

Roland felt that familiar flare of protectiveness rise within him at the mention, and as if he'd noticed, Leander continued: "I have been committed to my dear Nerea since we were children, Roland. As such, I am thoroughly unaffected by Evan's scent."

This time, Roland couldn't help but be a bit surprised by Leander's perceptiveness. "Was it  _that_ obvious?"

Leander smiled reassuringly. "Hydropolis may not have many tourists of the animal folk variety, but I have always had an intense love for reading. It's not unusual for an alpha in your situation to feel aggressive toward potential rivals, especially when your omega is in the midst of a heat."

Roland rubbed his forehead with a grimace. "Ah… 'Alpha'? 'Omega'?"

Leander's brows shot up in surprise. "Do they not have alphas and omegas in your world?"

"Well, I suppose we do, but it's not quite the same thing. Where I'm from, those words certainly wouldn't be used to describe  _humans_. Not medically, anyway."

"I see."

"Plus, the book I read on the subject didn't happen to mention those particular… titles."

Leander couldn't withhold a chuckle. "I wouldn't expect so. Those are intimate words meant only for those who are bonded. I would not have used them if I'd known you were unaware."

Roland and Leander resumed their walk around the gardens. "So you're not… disturbed?" Roland asked his companion curiously. "You're not offended by this development?"

Leander laughed through his nose. "Whyever should I be?"

Roland rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, I just thought…"

Leander placed a hand on Roland's shoulder, giving him a strong pat. "As a man who has been in love with someone he was not allowed to love for over three-hundred years, I am nothing but glad that Evan has found a mate he truly adores. I can think of no man better suited for our young king."

Roland allowed himself a rare moment of relief. "Thank you. That means a lot, Leander."

"Think nothing of it."

Pretending to betray Evan, even if it was for his own benefit, was going to be difficult. Regardless, it had to be done, and there was no hesitancy on Roland's end knowing that fact. He was worried about Evan, of course, but he also knew that Evan was far stronger and keener than most people would anticipate. Still, Roland preferred absolute security.

"Leander, may I ask a favor of you?"

"Of course."

Roland breathed a deep sigh through his nose and let it out slow. "Swear to me that you'll keep Evan safe, after I leave. Let no harm come to him, mentally  _or_ physically."

Leander placed his hand over his heart, inclining forward in a polite bow. "I swear on my life, naturally. He will be safe."

Roland firmly squashed the guilt and concern which rose into his throat like bile. He knew better than to worry unnecessarily about something that needed to be done. There was no sense in speculating on the impact this might have on Evan when he still intended to go through with it. He could only ensure everything went as planned, so that whatever distress he caused Evan will not have been in vain.

Regardless of the logic he imposed on himself, Roland couldn't help but worry. It meant a lot to him that Evan trusted him so thoroughly. To betray that trust, even for this, even if it was only pretend, made his chest seize with guilt. Could Evan ever trust him again? After pulling a stunt like this, would things be the same?

Suddenly, Roland couldn't prevent himself from smiling. He raised a hand to cover his face, holding back a laugh.

He was being ridiculous. Evan was  _so_ much stronger than he was giving him credit for. When exactly had Roland become so eager to take the role of the angst-filled romantic hero, or see Evan become the helpless heart-broken damsel?  _Ridiculous_.

He had faith in Evan. And he knew Evan had faith in him, too. Being away from Evan for any amount of time was undoubtedly going to be the most difficult aspect of this whole messy plan.

"In that case," Roland began, realizing too late that Leander had witnessed the entire play of emotions on his face but thankfully seemed unbothered by it, "perhaps we ought to start planning our next move."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Leander sees all. Leander knows all. Relinquish all you are to Hyrodropolis’s King, bow to him, obey him, marvel at his magnificence. 
> 
> Sorry, I went off on a thing there. 
> 
> I apologize in advance for any typos/mistakes in this chapter, I haven't had a lot of time to write/edit lately and I've been lacking inspiration to work on anything. Blahhh


	10. In which a certain subject is finally breached

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First off, I am so deeply sorry for the lack of updates lately. Life has been beyond hectic and I haven't had a single moment to sit down and write for weeks. As such, the chapter below is slightly unfinished, as in, I meant for there to be much more to this chapter but didn't have the time to finish it to my own standards. 
> 
> Before life got too busy to write, I had *almost* finished this fic which is why I'm saying 'screw it' and posting this somewhat unfinished chapter. Simply put, I'm not sure when I'm going to have time for writing in the near future, so I don't want to just sit on these partially finished chapters and leave this fic unfinished forever/leave you lovely people hanging. I'm not thrilled about posting unfinished/unpolished chapters, but I hate the idea of abandoning it even more, so this is where we're at. Thanks for sticking around and reading!

Roland returned to Evan's bedroom late in the evening. As he'd suspected, Evan was still soundly asleep, turned on his side but relaxed, breathing lightly. It seemed his heat was truly sated, at least for the moment, and Roland marveled at the difference between the contented boy he saw now and the same boy wracked with pain and discomfort from exactly one month ago.

Evan roused somewhat when Roland sat on the edge of the bed. He hummed a sleepy greeting, and Roland reached out a hand to gently brush through the young king's mussed hair. "How are you feeling?" Roland asked softly.

"Mmm." Evan shifted under the sheets, nuzzling into his pillow. "Good. I feel really good."

"That so?" Roland fussed with Evan's messy bangs, some of them sticking out at odd angles. "I must make a decent alpha, huh."

Evan's eyes popped open and went wide, and a blush fell over his cheeks. "W-who? Who said…?"

Roland couldn't help but laugh at Evan's reaction. "I overheard a pair of grimalkin speaking outside the palace." Ah, another lie. He would tell Evan the full truth later, every bit of it, but not when he was still riding out the tail end of his heat. They could tackle everything else later. "I didn't realize you had names for the different, er, roles."

Evan covered his face with his hands. It was quickly becoming his most endearing habit. "I would have mentioned it, b-but…"

"Embarrassing?" Roland ventured curiously.

Evan nodded. "It must seem so silly to someone like you... I'm sure you don't have anything like it in your world."

"That's not entirely true," Roland replied, shucking off his boots and pulling off his jacket to slide under the blankets beside Evan, pulling the boy close to him. "In my world, we have countless terms of endearment for our loved ones."

Evan buried his face eagerly in Roland's chest, breathing deeply, every now and again rubbing his scent glands against every bit of Roland's exposed skin he came into contact with. "Really?" he asked, muffled.

"It's not quite the same, but in some ways it's very similar. I don't think it's strange at all. In fact, I rather like it."

Evan pulled his face from Roland's chest to meet his eyes with his own in bright blue. His cheeks were flushed and there was an impish little smile on his face. Under the sheets, his hand sought out a hardness in Roland's slacks. "You must like it an awful lot, if  _this_ is any indicator," he teased. A moment later his smile vanished and his brow scrunched in confusion. "Wait, what is…?"

Roland couldn't contain an amused grin. Reaching into the pocket of his slacks he pulled out his cellphone - its battery long dead, of course - rubbing his thumb over the blackened screen. "Sorry to disappoint, your Majesty," he chuckled.

Evan groaned in mortification, his ears falling flat against his head. "Oh  _goodness_."

"It was a fair assumption, considering how we've been spending our time the last few days."

Evan offered Roland a quirk of his lips. His eyes moved to Roland's phone. "I've seen you look at this before," he observed, reaching out questioningly. Roland pressed the phone into his hand. Evan turned it over, looking at each side with his brow scrunched in confusion. "What is it? It's from your world, right?"

"It's called a phone. In my world, almost everyone has one. We use them to talk to each other over long distances, access information, take pictures, and even play games."

Evan's eyes popped open. "So it's a bit like Leafbook?"

"A bit."

Evan ran his thumbs over the black screen. "Does it still work?"

"Ah, well," Roland took back his phone, giving it a glance before sliding it back into his pocket, "Not anymore. Most of our technology runs on batteries, and my phone's battery didn't even make it through my first day here in your world." He smiled pensively. "It's fine, though. It's not like my phone would work properly here anyway."

Evan pushed his head against Roland's shoulder, getting into a more comfortable configuration. Roland wrapped his arms around the young king, resting his chin between the boy's ears.

"You said your phone device takes pictures?" Evan asked softly after a time of silence.

"Yes. Very similar to Leafbook."

The silence that followed was contemplative. After a moment, Evan spoke up. "Did… did you have any pictures of your family on your phone?"

Roland reflexively tensed. He tried to ignore the fact that he was about to confirm what Evan was subtly hinting at, that every time Evan ever saw him pull his phone out and glance forlornly at the perpetually blackened screen, he was yearning to see the faces of his wife and son. It was like divulging a sordid secret.

"Yeah."

Evan fell silent again. He nuzzled in close, his face partially pressed against Roland's chest. He breathed deeply through his nose and let it out slow.

"You must really miss them." Evan's voice was muffled, soft.

Roland squeezed the smaller form in his arms. His heart clenched. "My wife passed away years ago, but I do still miss her. And my son… he's very sick. And after what happened..." Roland swallowed a knot in his throat. "I have no idea if he's still alive."

"I'm… I'm so terribly sorry, Roland."

"It's alright. I've had months to accept it all." He pressed a chaste kiss to the crown of Evan's head. "Furthermore, I'm happy here, with you. I don't want you to think for even a moment that I'm unhappy where I am, or that I don't love you dearly."

Evan began softly purring. "I'd really like to see pictures of your family. They sound like beautiful people."

"They were."

"Do you think… they would have liked me?" Evan's voice was barely audible, he was so deeply buried in Roland's chest. "Would they approve of all this?"

Roland smiled gently. "I think the whole situation would be hard for them to wrap their heads around, but I can't imagine they would dislike you. You're wonderful, Evan. They would see that, certainly."

In minutes, Evan's purring dwindled as the young king fell asleep. Roland considered sleeping as well, but his mind was swimming with too many thoughts of faux betrayal and loss to manage it. He settled for watching over Evan as he slept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH MY GOSH GUYS. I know I said it before but I'm super sorry about the insane delay. My husband and I brilliantly decided to sell our house/buy a new house, and to say things are insane around here is a tragic understatement. It's exciting but also terrifying, but the bottom line is that I have zero time to do anything other than paint/clean/organize/pack/talk with the realtor/etc. ADULTING IS HARD. But since this may be a months-long process, I felt it necessary to start posting the chapters I've finished. The overall narrative won't be as strong or as structured as I originally wanted, but at least it will actually have an ending!
> 
> Anyone still out there? I missed you guys!


	11. In which finally, nothing gold can stay

" _King Evan! I have great news!"_

_Evan turns to see Bracken jog up to his side, falling into step with him as he rounds the corner of the general store. Evan offers her a bright smile. "Good morning Bracken. What's the news?"_

_Bracken's grin is prideful and vaguely mischievous. "That 'special present' you ordered for Roland is finished! It still needs some testing, of course, and since Roland has the only 'cell phone' in our world, I suppose part of the 'surprise' will be if his big surprise actually works or not."_

" _That's wonderful!" Evan exclaims. "Thank you so much, Bracken! I knew you could do it!"_

_Bracken anchors her hands on her hips, lips upturned in a rosy grin. "I'll admit, I almost pulled the plug on this project when Roland pulled his little double-agent routine, but I'm glad I didn't. Now you can give it to him as a 'welcome back' present!"_

_Evan feels a flush fall over his face. His nervousness settles in his stomach, but he knows he's excited, too. "Ah… Yes, I suppose I can."_

_._

It hurt.

Evan knew it would, but somehow that hadn't prepared him for what it felt like in the aftermath. Years ago, Evan's father confided in him how it felt to lose his mother, how hollow one could feel once a bond like theirs was broken. He said it felt like a piece of him had gone missing, a piece which belonged solely to his beloved wife. Grimalkin usually mated for life, so it was expected, he said. Continuing to live without her was possible of course, but it would be fraught with pain and discomfort, he said. That was the unfortunate - but still wondrously beautiful - side-effect of forming a mating bond.

Roland may not have died, but the moment he'd dematerialized in the throne room, Evan felt a piece inside of him slide out of place, vanishing along with the trail of residual glimmers.

.

" _What is this?" Roland asks with an interested half-smile, slowly taking the brightly wrapped parcel from Evan's hands. Evan's face is pink but his eyes are bright and eager, watching Roland closely as his gift is accepted._

_"A present," Evan explains uselessly as Roland inspects the box._

_Roland offers him a surprised grin. "Any specific occasion?"_

_"Not particularly," Evan hums, lacing his fingers behind his back as his tail sways in wide swoops. "I just… Well, I just really hope you like it."_

_"I expect I'll like anything you think to give me," Roland replies. Evan's heart soars. "Should I open it now?"_

" _Yes!" Evan answers, perhaps too eagerly. Roland chuckles and moves to sit on the edge of Evan's bed, holding the box in his lap. Evan joins him, sitting so close their hips are touching, watching Roland begin to peel back the shiny paper with quiet anticipation._

_Roland lets the paper fall to the floor. He opens the box and peers inside, his brow drawing together in confusion._

_"Before you say anything," Evan cuts in quickly, "this device is, well, one-of-a-kind. And it isn't just a gift from me, it's sort of from everyone, Bracken in particular. She's been working on it for almost two months! And I admit, we weren't really able to test it so it's not guaranteed to work, so-"_

_"Evan," Roland stops the boy with a laugh, placing a hand reassuringly on the king's small shoulder, "it sounds like you and Bracken have gone to an awful lot of trouble over… whatever this is, so thank you very much. I love it." He glances back down at his gift. "Now. What_ is _it?"_

_Evan carefully picks up the device, looking it over. He quickly finds what he's looking for and turns the device on its side, flipping a switch. A muted whirring sound comes from within, and a few small lights flick on._

" _May I see your phone, Roland?"_

" _My phone?" Roland reaches his hand into his pocket before he can even voice his confusion. Regardless of his trepidation, Roland hands Evan his phone, watching on in interest. "I don't mind but, what for?"_

" _You'll see," Evan takes the phone and gives it a thorough look-over before placing it gently on the flat surface of the device, fitting the base of it into a slotted section. There is a dull click, and the whirring gets marginally louder. Evan's eyes blow open, relieved. "I think it's working!" he exclaims, a delighted smile parting his lips. Roland leans in to look, finally beginning to understand what this strange device was meant to do._

_"Evan, is this…? Some kind of battery?"_

_Evan beams. "We didn't know if it would work! … It is working, right? Is it working? Is it, well, uhm, can you tell if it's giving power to your phone?"_

_Roland takes the device from Evan's hands, bringing his phone closer to check. A tiny blue light pulses at the top of his phone's screen, a light Evan has never seen before, and judging from Roland's expression, a light Roland had never expected to see again. "I can barely believe it, but… Yeah, it is. It's working perfectly." He angles his head to look down at Evan with one of the fondest expressions Evan has ever seen. Evan's heart swells. "Evan, this is amazing. You went to all this trouble just so I could use my phone? Why?"_

.

Evan didn't blame Roland for leaving, of course. Both his coming here and his leaving were entirely involuntary in the first place, but more than that, he knew Roland needed to go back. His world was in peril, just as Evan's had been, and abandoning his people when they needed him most was out of Roland's character at best, immoral at worst. If destiny had brought them together, than perhaps destiny pulled them apart, as well. Evan couldn't fault destiny. He could bite his thumb at it, however.

A voice spoke quietly from behind him.

"He's gone, isn't he?" It was Leander. Evan realized suddenly that at some point, he'd fallen to his knees, right where Roland had disappeared. His second and much more embarrassing realization was that he'd been silently crying, and the evidence was sprinkled on the marble floor in round, glistening droplets. His face flushed in shame. There was nothing more un-kingly than being caught crying on the floor.

Leander's footsteps came nearer, as did a second, much daintier set. "I'm so sorry, Evan," Leander spoke again, as Evan scrubbed furiously at his wet eyes and sucked a deep breath in through his nose to steady his breathing. "I was concerned something like this might happen, after learning what we did about Doloran."

"I'm fine," Evan lied, standing up and brushing himself off, hoping no one noticed how his hands trembled. "I think I knew, somewhere deep down. I just didn't want to believe it. But I'm fine," he quickly assured.

"There is no shame in sadness, Evan," a soothing feminine voice reminded, and Evan turned to see Queen Nerea standing at Leander's side, a soft expression on her lovely face. Evan's eyes darted away, even more embarrassed to be seen in such a state by someone outside of his inner circle.

"I am a King," Evan answered softly. "It is my sworn duty to be strong and unwavering for my people, and I intend to do just that. Life will be full of greetings and partings. I cannot let something like this compromise me, I must carry on. I must-" Evan was cut off mid-sentence and pulled into a tight embrace, his cheek pressed hard into Nerea's bosom, her arms comfortingly wound around his mildly trembling frame.

"The sooner you harden your heart, King Evan, the sooner your reign becomes cold and distant. No one knows this better than I. Your warmth and compassion brought you this far, Evan. Dear Roland would not want you to become unfeeling because of him. That is the very last thing he would want." She rubbed his back tenderly. It felt good, Evan decided, like he was in his mother's arms once again. "It hurts, but you need to feel it. Please don't shut it out."

.

" _Because I don't want you to be afraid anymore," Evan says in a small voice. He averts his eyes. He didn't mean to say it. He'd meant to say something like 'I want you to be able to have a piece of your old life' or 'I'd like to see your family, if you would let me have the privilege'. Now that he'd said it, though, there was no taking it back._

_"Afraid?" Roland's voice is not offended or judgmental. It's gentle and inquiring, perhaps a little confused, and his arm winds around Evan's shoulders to pull him in close. "Afraid of what?"_

_Evan sucks in a shallow breath. "Afraid of… of looking back. Of remembering the world you came from. The world… you n-need to return to."_

_Beside him, Roland freezes. His arm, a moment ago so warm and loving around him, seems suddenly frigid. But he does not let go._

" _I'm so sorry, Roland," Evan continues perilously, unable to stop now that he's gotten the courage to get going, "for everything you've lost. I want more than anything to take that pain away, and to believe that you'll stay here with me forever. But…" Evan feels small, so very small. Small and scared. "...we both know this can't go on the way it is."_

_Roland shifts beside him. "Evan, are you…? Are you-"_

_"N-no, I'm not… I mean, I'm not trying to- to end anything, Roland. I love you. I can't imagine my life without you anymore. But…" He pulls a shaky breath in through his nose, letting it out slowly between his lips, trying hard not to cry. He'd sworn to himself he wouldn't cry. Roland's fingers tighten comfortingly around his shoulder. "If you need to go back to your world - if something like that becomes possible - you need to go back. We both know you do."_

_A silence falls over the bedroom, ringing and tense. Evan feels like he's shrinking into himself, like he's just ruined the best thing that's ever happened to him. He wishes he'd never said anything, never brought it up, but he knew it was something that needed to be discussed. Their bliss meant nothing if they refused to acknowledge the possibility of it ending. It would only be make-believe._

" _I know." Roland finally says, his arm falling from Evan's shoulder. They sit hip to hip, both of them staring resolutely at the floor. "Evan… I truthfully don't know what's going to happen. But I need you to know that I love you."_

" _I know you do."_

" _I want to stay here with you. I never want to leave your side."_

_Evan's eyes were glossy with tears. "I know. But you might. And if you can, you should."_

_Roland breathes in sharply through his nose as though he'd pricked himself on something sharp. "...You're right." Roland's hand raises to touch Evan's face, to gently urge him to meet his eyes. Evan does not resist him, hot tears spilling over his cheeks. His heart squeezes painfully when he sees that Roland is crying too. A sob escapes Evan's lips at the sight of it. Roland pulls Evan into a tight embrace, burying his face in Evan's shoulder, his chest rising in a deep, steadying breath. Evan hugs him back, trying hard to hold back his tears but feeling himself coming undone nonetheless._

" _Would you ever forgive me?" Roland asks, his voice carrying traces of desperation and vulnerability the likes Evan has never heard from him._

.

At once, Evan broke down. He sobbed into Nerea's dress, holding her tightly, his eyes squeezed shut. Leander stood beside him, a hand braced on his shoulder, as Nerea whispered soothing words and rubbed his back.

Although they'd defeated the Horned One and set everything right, Evan certainly felt as though the world was ending. He had to admit, however, knowing that he had people to depend on seemed like a pinprick of light in the darkness that was engulfing his heart. Of  _course_ he could forgive Roland. He'd told him that, he'd made sure Roland would never think for even a moment that he would bear any ill will toward him for doing what was right and just. Roland - his mate, the love of his life - was a hero. He hoped desperately that wherever Roland ended up, he could find happiness.

But for Evan, there was no happiness to be had in a world without Roland.

.

.

.

Evan was thumbing carefully through a weathered, shabby book when a steaming cup of tea was set just next to his arm, the heat of the liquid radiating warmth against his skin.

"I've never seen anyone so absorbed in a book," Came Doloran's deep voice, with a fond chuckle. "Is it really so interesting to you? Reading about a place that no longer exists?"

Evan pulled his attention away from the yellowed page he was scouring and flashed Doloran a smile. "If we're truly going to rebuild Allegoria, I at least want to learn all I can about what sort of a place it was to begin with," Evan pointed out, looping two fingers through the teacup's handle and bringing it to his lips, blowing over it. "Oh, thank you for this. It smells delicious."

"Of course." Doloran sat on the opposite side of the table, his own cup in hand. "Have you found anything useful in there?"

"Define useful," Evan answered with a quirk of his lips, flipping through a few pages to find a point of interest. He turned the book around so that Doloran could see, and motioned to a beautifully drawn picture of Allegoria's palace and the surrounding villas. "I'm mostly fascinated with these illustrations, but I notice they're uncredited. Do you have any idea who drew them? They're breathtaking."

Doloran barely glanced at them, sipping gingerly at his tea for a moment. "I did, actually."

"Wh- You?" Evan's eyes were as round as dinner plates. He glanced back down at the picture in astonishment. "Doloran, you are so very talented!"

"It was so long ago, now. I'm sure that talent has long since abandoned me."

"Nonsense!" Evan insisted. "I'm sure a talent like this can only grow, even after years of neglect."

Doloran smiled somewhat sadly. "Years, perhaps. Several centuries, however, is quite a different story."

Evan traced his fingertips gently over another illustration, this one a beautiful portrait of Alisandra in her kingmaker form, watching over Allegoria. "Perhaps you're right," Evan answered meekly. He suddenly realized that perhaps it was a painful topic for Doloran. "Still, it seems a shame to waste such a wonderful talent."

Doloran watched Evan carefully for a moment. "I never had a passion for it. But Alisa…. She loved to watch me draw. I couldn't help but enjoy it, when she was around to encourage it. She was the one to suggest I submit them when it came time to write books about our great kingdom, but I did so anonymously. It seemed silly to seek recognition in the art world, when my duty and passion lay in the crown."

"That's humble of you." Evan replied with a grin.

"Not at all," Doloran said with a dismissive wave of his hand. "It would have been a bother."

Evan gently closed the book, smoothing his hand over its thick faded cover. It was amazing that Doloran had any books left from the time of Allegoria, but Evan suspected he'd used some sort of charm on them to keep them from completely falling apart.

"We should make copies of these books, and keep them in Goldpaw's library," Evan suggested, the idea striking him like a little jolt of electricity. "With your new kingdom being built, it couldn't hurt to educate the world about what the original Allegoria was like. I'm sure people would love to learn!"

Doloran smiled at him, in just the way that tightened Evan's heart and caused a flush to fall over his cheeks. Most of the time it was easy to separate Dorolan from Roland in his mind - they weren't the same person, after all, regardless of their shared soul - but other times, the familiarity was too real, too painful. Even more rarely, Doloran looked at him with such tenderness that Evan very nearly wanted to let himself believe Roland was with him once more. Even after a year, (a year and twenty-eight days, to be exact) those sorts of thoughts hadn't ceased for even a moment. He wished they would.

"That's a good idea. I shall make the arrangements to have the books copied. It will be quite the undertaking, however… Perhaps I should wait until I have begun to rebuild my kingdom."

Evan took a gulp of tea, the comforting warmth flowing down his throat, warming his chest. "You know, I don't think it even has to come to that. I've been learning a spell recently, a 'cloning spell', Hau Ling calls it. I've never attempted it on a book before, and I'm sure some tests will have to be performed, but I'm sure it will work!"

Doloran smiled again. Evan's heart panged with pain. "That's very kind of you."

"N-not at all." Evan's averted his eyes and focused on his tea. For a moment, nothing was said, and the two kings enjoyed their drinks in companionable silence.

After he'd drained his cup, Doloran criss-crossed his fingers and set his hands on the table. "Evan, may I inquire as to a rather personal matter?" he asked gently.

Evan, not quite finished with his own tea, almost jumped in his seat. "A-ah, of course!" He set his slightly jostled cup down on the table. "What is it?"

Doloran breathed a calm sigh that rose and fell gracefully in his chest. "If you do not wish to discuss it, we will speak no more about it, but… I can sense that your heat is very near. How are you faring, without your bondmate?"

Evan had never been unexpectedly splashed with freezing cold water before, but he imagined it felt a lot like this. The young king sat frozen in shock, staring at Doloran with slightly parted lips and a word stuck halfway in his throat. It took him several awkward moments to collect himself, and even then he was sure he was absolutely red-faced.

"I, uhm, that is, ah…" Evan cleared his throat and tried again. "H-how did you…?"

Doloran offered him an apologetic smile. "The alpha in me is nearly incapable of ignoring the symptoms, but I believe my connection to Roland has made me especially sensitive to your cycle. I felt a pull toward you the moment we met, a sensation I had only ever felt with Alisa. I recognized what it was right away."

Evan covered his face in his hands. "So you've known all this time…?"

"I'm afraid so. I never made mention because I did not want to damage our new and very fragile friendship." He paused, concerned. "I hope I have not done just that."

"N-no of course not!" Evan insisted, dropping his hands and standing from the table. "I'm… just a touch embarrassed, is all. And… surprised, I suppose, that you could tell even though I'm taking a suppressant."

Doloran laughed through his nose. "As I said, I seem to be overly sensitive to it."

 _Like a bondmate_ , Evan thought uncomfortably. Perhaps Doloran could see the discomfort on his face, for he quickly put in, "I deeply apologize if I spoke out of turn. I thought- well, I assumed that perhaps you occasionally sought my company because of my connection to Roland. Was I wrong?"

Evan felt the air leave his lungs. His mortification took a backseat to his sudden fierce and powerful desire to set his dear friend straight. "N-no, I- I mean,  _yes_ , uhm…" Evan stole a deep breath. "I do so enjoy your company, Doloran! We're friends, I promise I'm not just trying to… to  _replace_ Roland with you, that would be… t-that's  _horrible_ -"

At some point during Evan's frantic explanation, Doloran rose from the table and walked around it, pushing Evan's chair carefully aside, stopping mere inches from Evan. Evan trailed off, following Doloran with his eyes first, and then turning to face him when Doloran moved in close. His breath stilled in his chest. He could smell it, it was faint but there, the musk that tended to accompany an alpha. Roland wasn't from this world, but as their bond had deepened, Evan had grown to love his unique scent all the same. That made it all the more difficult now, breathing in Doloran's scent. Somehow or other, he smelled like Roland. Even though they were worlds apart, even though Roland wasn't an alpha in the literal sense of the word. It made Evan's mind reel and his heart flutter. The omega in him was thrumming with desire.

"I never meant to imply that you had ulterior motives for seeking my company. Between the both of us,  _I_  admit to being guilty of that, to a certain extent."

"Y-you…?" Evan asked, wide-eyed. "What do you mean?"  _Just let him fill the piece of you that is broken!_ his omega whispered.

Doloran reached out to gently touch Evan's face, in much the same way Roland used to. Evan fought the urge to push into his palm and start purring. Instead he just stood very, very still.

"My soul bond with Roland has made it difficult for me to avoid having feelings for you, I suppose." Dorolan looked sad for a moment, rubbing his thumb affectionately over Evan's cheek. "I wish for your happiness. Not just because of my bond with Roland, but because I care for you as well. If I can help to comfort you, in any way, I want you to know that I would not hesitate."

Evan's heart was beating a mile a minute, his skin growing hot. "Are you… are you asking to b-be my…?"

"To be your alpha? Yes, I suppose I am." Doloran lowered his hand, his eyes intense and focused. "We have both lost more than we can possibly endure. Our families, our kingdoms, our bondmates. No one understands your plight better than I. I'm not asking to replace Roland, or for you to replace Alisa. I just thought perhaps I could be of some comfort to you."

A chance to feel complete again. That's what Doloran was offering him. For a flash, Evan felt tempted by Doloran's offer, tempted to just jump into Doloran's arms without a second thought. Guilt flared within him. He still loved Roland, how could he consider trying to replace him like this? It wouldn't be real. It might feel real, but it wouldn't be. And it wouldn't be fair, not to Roland, not to Doloran, and especially not to himself.

Evan summoned a smile, glancing up at Doloran with a faint blush.

"My father never loved anyone after my mother passed," he said pensively. "He was lonely, but it was his own decision. Thank you for worrying about me - no, for caring about me, Doloran, but I don't think I can be with you in that way. I'm not entirely sure what the future holds for me, but I know that for now, I'm still devoted to Roland."

The smile Doloran returned suggested he knew Evan would say something along those lines. He lifted his hand again, only to brush his knuckles softly over Evan's cheek. "I understand. It just seems unfair, is all. That the ruler of a kingdom of happily-ever-afters doesn't get his own." He lowered his hand. "I just want you to know, after all you've done for me, that I am here for you. As a friend, or as… whatever it is you wish. I'm here."

Evan's eyes burned with the threat of tears. He willed them away and offered Doloran a bright smile. "Thank you, Doloran. Really."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Anyone still here?? Remember this fic I was writing?? 
> 
> The hubs and I sold our house, bought a new house, and we're finally all settled in! The inspiration to write sorta.... well, died, what with all the stress of the move and all the changes that brought. Change is pretty rough on me, even when it's a super-good change. But I'm slowly feeling the urge to write coming back, and I managed to finish this chapter! It's still not 100% the way I wanted it - actually, this chapter was supposed to be 2 chapters - but hey, that I'm posting anything at all is miraculous lmao. 
> 
> Only one chapter to go! (And I swear it will be WAY less angsty than this chapter! No spoilers buuuuut let's just say I like happy endings lol) Hopefully I'll be done with it soon. It was already partially written before we moved, so it shouldn't be too hard to pick up again. :) Let me know if you're still reading after all this time, I want to give ya'll cookies and hugs!!!!


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